# when a bad idea just won't go away...



## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

I was skimming through Winterous' thread 'A funny army theme' and I decided to post this. I figure you all would get a chuckle out of it. I'm not actually planning on doing this army, but damn it, the concept just won't go away.

Heres how it started. Like 5 years ago I was building a Chimera for my Deamonhunters, and as I built the two sides of the hull I moved them together and pushed them off to the side to make space to build the turret. As I moved the two parts together I looked at it, and with out really thinking about it I said "Hey look, a clown sized land raider" the resemblance was passing at the best but that was enough to get the idea off and running. Everyone in the hobby center heard what I said, saw what I said it about, and quickly started having their own ideas about a the "Clown Space Marines". So now, 5 years later the idea itself is very nearly to a point where I can no longer resist making the army.

Here are some of the ideas:

1) Space Marine Captian- The Lead clown, the bozo, the guy who draws all your attention while his cohorts set up for the next gag. Comes equipped the Multi-colored Iron Affro (Iron Halo). Seriously, the bullets get stuck in the hair.

2) Assault Marines: Truely skilled performers, they now use spring loaded shoes (jump packs) to achieve feats of great skill and daring.

3) Deep Striking Terminators: The clowns that get shot out of the cannon (Basilisk Barrage anyone?)

4) Land Speeder: The Clowns that are riding a unicycle on a high wire. Their balance bar holds gun pods.

5) Rhinos: Anyone know where I can buy micro machines? But you have to roll 2d6 each time you disembark to determine how many marines get out of the Rhino. 

6) Astartes Grenade Launcher equipped models: Master Jugglers, these nimble acrobats pack an interesting surprise for their viewers. 

So any other thoughts you all would like to toss in here? I'm not planning on doing this, but the ideas just keep coming up and I'm finding it harder and harder to say no to the idea.


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## Ultra111 (Jul 9, 2009)

This could be worth a few laughs lol

Stat wise are you just going to use vanilla codex stats etc?

would loce to see how you managed conversions lol


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

Number 4 made my lul XD


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Flamer units as fire eaters.
Whirlwinds are pie launching catapults.
Biker squads on mini bikes. 
Vanguard squads have squirting flower lapels. 
Sternguard are jugglers with bowling pins.
Chapter Master is a ring leader with top hat and long tailed tuxedo.
Terminators have to have those really big clown pants with suspenders.
Big clown shoes for power fists. (Angry marines power feet.)


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## Doelago (Nov 29, 2009)

Unforgiven302 said:


> Flamer units as fire eaters.
> Whirlwinds are pie launching catapults.
> Biker squads on mini bikes.
> Vanguard squads have squirting flower lapels.
> ...


You said it! :victory:


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

The only thing is, a clown army would have to be chaos... because we all know clowns are pure fucking evil.


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## the-ad-man (Jan 22, 2010)

Unforgiven302 said:


> The only thing is, a clown army would have to be chaos... because we all know clowns are pure fucking evil.


oblits are clowns with a surprise up their sleeve....


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Yeah, they would need the top hat to pull the "rabbit" out of. A rabbit lascannon...

They could also have the neverending hankerchief out of the pocket gag too...

Do a three stooges oblits unit. Moe, Larry and curly... "Nyuk-nyuk-nyuk...!"


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## hungryugolino (Sep 12, 2009)

Although everyone knows the real clowns are Ultramarines.


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## Col. Schafer (Apr 15, 2008)

Unforgiven302 said:


> Yeah, they would need the top hat to pull the "rabbit" out of. A rabbit lascannon...


Better yet; "summoned Rabbits" model all your icon bearers with top-hats.


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Col. Schafer said:


> Better yet; "summoned Rabbits" model all your icon bearers with top-hats.


Midgets and flying monkeys as summoned demons. 

Bearded lady, Siamese twins, The dog faced boy, the fat lady and other sideshow freaks could all be demon princes, possessed or spawn.


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## shaantitus (Aug 3, 2009)

He's right. It won't go away. Very cool idea though. I knew someone would figure out a way to include big shoes in a meaningful way.


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

Unforgiven302 said:


> Bearded lady, Siamese twins, The dog faced boy, the fat lady and other sideshow freaks could all be demon princes, possessed or spawn.


Every Spawn could be labelled as "The world's most useless man!"


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

shaantitus said:


> He's right. It won't go away. Very cool idea though. I knew someone would figure out a way to include big shoes in a meaningful way.


Told ya. See, the idea is so terrible you're like "No, It's not worth doing" but then you realise you can't not think about it. It like implants itself into your brain and is unwilling to leave, and longer it's in there, the more you think about doing it. It's a disease I'm telling you! Run! Run you fools, save yourselves before it's too late! Fear the Plague!


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## Keikan300 (Aug 25, 2010)

I admire anybody that can hold onto a theme idea, like this one, and carry it through to the end. Many moons ago, I saw an Imperial Space Marine Army. Imperial as in Star Wars. It was very impressive.

I would like to see a clown army. There would be a ton of conversions, but in the end, it would be really cool.


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

Keikan300 said:


> I admire anybody that can hold onto a theme idea, like this one, and carry it through to the end. Many moons ago, I saw an Imperial Space Marine Army. Imperial as in Star Wars. It was very impressive.
> 
> I would like to see a clown army. There would be a ton of conversions, but in the end, it would be really cool.



curse you Keikan, I must now build this army :russianroulette:.

sigh... I'll post information as I develop it. 

I guess I'll start with a Tactical squad and a Land Speeder. 

already have an idea for the flamer marine, he'll be a fire eater. I'll take a marine with an exposed head that screaming (hard to find I know  ) and he'll have a flaming stick in one hand.

Any suggestions for the missile launcher equipped marine?


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## Durzod (Nov 24, 2009)

It's gotta be a cream pie launcher.


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## shaantitus (Aug 3, 2009)

Chapter master Krusty and Sideshow Bob


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Maverike Prime said:


> Any suggestions for the missile launcher equipped marine?


Yeah, a clown with a big horn with a rocket coming out the end. Pie's would be good too.

Don't forget to incorporate unicycles into the army! 

You need a name for the army too.


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

I think a pie cannon for the ML is perfect.
And what about Apothecaries? You know when a clown gets 'hurt' and the ambulence clowns come out? One of those, holding a stretcher


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## ShadowMatt (Sep 9, 2008)

Seltzer bottles for plasma.
One of those boxing gloves on an extending arm as a power fist.


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

Winterous said:


> I think a pie cannon for the ML is perfect.
> And what about Apothecaries? You know when a clown gets 'hurt' and the ambulence clowns come out? One of those, holding a stretcher


:ireful2::ireful2::angry::crazy::headbutt::headbutt::blackeye:

maybe I can take a pair of Guardsmen, give 'em big floppy shoes, and big red noses and Medic flags on their backs with the pair of them carrying a stretcher. 

I think I'll do a unit of Bikers just so I can model them on unicycles. Arm them with those corn shooter thingies. You know the little tinny gun with the ginormous bottle of corn kernals on top of it. 



> Whirlwinds are pie launching catapults.


Does kind of give a new meaning to "Pie plate him to death" doesn't it? though maybe vindicators would be better suited to this role. Hehe I could run an Eldar Nightspinner and say it's launching confetti.


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## GrimzagGorwazza (Aug 5, 2010)

Maverike Prime said:


> already have an idea for the flamer marine, he'll be a fire eater. I'll take a marine with an exposed head that screaming (hard to find I know  ) and he'll have a flaming stick in one hand.


how about putting one of these coming out of his mouth, or from the stick where he is spitting.

http://www.waylandgames.co.uk/Armor...-Thrower-Gouts-of-Fire-10pcs-/prod_10083.html


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## KhainiteAssassin (Mar 18, 2009)

Missile Launchers = pie launchers for sure, since pies are never massive.

Id make jump troops look like the Clowns that GET launched out of a cannon, and have your Vindicator BE the cannon


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

KhainiteAssassin said:


> Missile Launchers = pie launchers for sure, since pies are never massive.
> 
> Id make jump troops look like the Clowns that GET launched out of a cannon, and have your Vindicator BE the cannon


They tow their cannon around with them?
:laugh:


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

You going to have to use Epic scale rhinos. You know, clown cars are real small.

I like the power fist extendo-glove, perfect!

What could the clowns on stilts be used as? We already have spring shoes for jump troops.


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

Dreadnoughts? :S


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## aboytervigon (Jul 6, 2010)

dreadnoughts could be clowns with inflatable muscles.


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## KhainiteAssassin (Mar 18, 2009)

Winterous said:


> They tow their cannon around with them?
> :laugh:


hey Im trying. lol


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

I think it's a good idea really.
Fuck it, Dreadnoughts could just be Elephants.


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

Winterous said:


> I think it's a good idea really.
> Fuck it, Dreadnoughts could just be Elephants.


I'm not sure I want to know what the flammer attack would be....


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## Sethis (Jun 4, 2009)

Unforgiven302 said:


> What could the clowns on stilts be used as? We already have spring shoes for jump troops.


Model them as walking on stilts through trees (as in, the same height as the foliage) and call them Scouts?

The colour scheme though... my eyes are bleeding just _thinking_ about it...


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

Sethis said:


> Model them as walking on stilts through trees (as in, the same height as the foliage) and call them Scouts?
> 
> The colour scheme though... my eyes are bleeding just _thinking_ about it...



I know I'm going to regret this...

What are your thoughts for a color scheme Sethis?

as a side note:


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Maverike Prime said:


> I know I'm going to regret this...
> 
> What are your thoughts for a color scheme Sethis?
> 
> as a side note:


Color scheme is probably going to end up looking like eldar harlequins with stripes, checks, squares, triangles and the like. (Wait, 40k clowns aren't a new concept after all...)

I just thought about my guy on stilts question. He could be a jump troop too. Spring shoes for some, stilts for others and a bunch of balloons for another. 

A dreadnought could still be a contemporary style dreadnought, just clowned up. I was thinking that a dread in a wooden barrel held up with suspenders would be funny.


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

Unforgiven302 said:


> A dreadnought could still be a contemporary style dreadnought, just clowned up. I was thinking that a dread in a wooden barrel held up with suspenders would be funny.


This.
This X 1,000,000.


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## Maverike Prime (May 4, 2010)

just because someone had to do it, I figured it might as well have been me...
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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Or...


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## Winterous (Mar 30, 2009)

Third link didn't work :S

You got rid of it


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## Unforgiven302 (Oct 20, 2008)

Winterous said:


> Third link didn't work :S
> 
> You got rid of it


Yeah, I forgot to save it...


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## shaantitus (Aug 3, 2009)

Unforgiven302 said:


> You going to have to use Epic scale rhinos. You know, clown cars are real small.


Good plan. You would be able to get a cover save for a rhino/clown car parked behind a trooper.


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## Sethis (Jun 4, 2009)

Colour Scheme? White with Red Polka dots across the board as a unifying theme. Add vomit-when-you've-eaten-nothing-but-sweetcorn-for-a-week yellow and clash-with-everything purple to mark out individual units. Sergeants can be distinguished by their oh-my-god-I-just-had-an-epileptic-seizure blue hats.


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## Syko515 (Jan 22, 2008)

....as a hard core Juggalo i have to say.... WTF, this was my idea from like 4 years ago! glad to see its not just me.

in your shoes, pun, i would look towards the psycho scare clowns as inspiriation for a Chaos clown marine army. we're talking Clown from spawn, maybe the faces of the dark carnival VIA ICP, don't forget killer clowns from outer space ...you know that horrible 1980's horror flick. and then theres Pennywise from stephen kings IT.


i planned my army to be black and red with white and black face paint for each marine, mostly khorne berzerkers , the whole "run with the Hatchet" thing. then a pair of deamon princes to rep Violent J and Shaggy. as for vehicles? they'd have the army colors but all be a different jokers card face...nothing like getting blown up by a ringmaster vindie.


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