# The Reasonable Marines- Traitorus Extremus chapter



## C'Tan Chimera

The Reasonable Marines are hardly official, but they have a tiny fanbase around the Internet with only a small-but greatly amusing- amount of fluff. I'm not going to go firing off links left and right, but I'll sum them up quickly with some quotes that had some of the fat trimmed off for your eyeballs convenience.



- "Reasonable Marines operate with efficiency. They always prefer to force a surrender rather than routing the enemy, and take prisoners to interrogate them humanely and use as bargaining chips."

-"Seeking vision without prejudice, the most important thing to them is to successfully serve the true interests of the Imperium. If this involves even befriending xenos, then that is what they will do."

- "Their armor is painted to blend into their environment in order to limit visibility . No matter how cool it looks, a Reasonable Marine still needs to request permission to carry nonstandard equipment into battle"

-"As such, they're super happy sunshine puppy best friends with the Tau since they are the only other faction who have the word "Reasonable" in their dictionaries."


*OTHER TIDBITS*

-They do believe the Emperor was a pretty great and brilliant guy, but they abstain from any zealotry and don't conform with a lot of the beliefs and fanaticism associated with Marines. As such, they are considered full blown traitors like the Alpha Legion or Word Bearers. 

-Despite their frequent aid to the Imperium, they're still considered traitors.

-Again they're considered traitors for techno-heresy as they trade often with the Tau.

-They're hated by just about every other race within 40k with the exception of the Tau *and even then they still come into brief conflicts from time to time* and the frequent defectors from Imperial Guard. Though they also seem to have 'Sisters of Reason' as well. 

- They're obsessed with the use of Land Raiders, getting a particular amount of Heresy accusation from their insistence to allow Guardsmen to access such vehicles. Their raiders also have blinkers and go "BEEP BEEP" while in reverse.

- They're despised even more by the Inquisition for often denying them Exterminatus runs with diplomacy. _"Upon news of the system's swift re-absorption into the Imperium of Man, Inquisitor Explodor (Ref. The Big Book of 101 Exterminatus Methods) kicked a nearby wall, and was heard to utter 'Dangit'. "_

-The planets under their domain flourish with efficient public transport, eco-friendly energy systems, and proven effective self-defense systems should they ever come under assault.

- They have warning stickers on their chainswords.

-Nobody ever signs up to carry the plasma weapons.



So what do you guys think? They're fun, interesting, and unexpected. I might give these guys a spin.


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## BlackGuard

...Heretics!


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## warsmith7752

So they take everything that's wrong with space marines and throw them out the window? Mildly amusing concept but from what's here the angry marines are still no.1 joke chapter in my books.


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## Giant Fossil Penguin

They should all wear bowler hats, carry umbrellas and preface every sentence with, 'I say, Old Chap!'
Monocles.

GFP


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## gen.ahab

Giant Fossil Penguin said:


> 'I say, Old Chap!'
> Monocles.
> 
> GFP


If that were the case they would all be wearing bright red long coats, they would all be standing one large group, their weapons would only fire one shot and they would never get to make that shot because they would be to busy drinking tea and bitching about they people they are suppose to be killing. :biggrin:

I am not hating on Brits, I love y'all.... kind of.


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## cegorach

gen.ahab said:


> If that were the case they would all be wearing bright red long coats, they would all be standing one large group, their weapons would only fire one shot and they would never get to make that shot because they would be to busy drinking tea and bitching about they people they are suppose to be killing. :biggrin:
> 
> I am not hating on Brits, I love y'all.... kind of.


thats a complete lie ... they would complain about the weather too ...


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## C'Tan Chimera

So basically these guys?










_"I say, I do believe these guardsmen are shooting at us!" Inquisitor Fob yelled over the sound of the Classy Marine's flintlock bolters, as he and Brother Captain Houston ducked another volley from the heretical Guardsmens' lasrifles.

"Indeed they are sir," Brother Captain Houston responded as he let loose a few shoots, decapitating a batch of traitor guardsmen. "Some would even say it's quite heretical, sir," Brother Captain Houston continued, hoping the Inquisitor would get the hint as he politely pushed Fob's head down under the make shift barricade as another round of lasfire came in.

"Oh no, I'm quite sure it's just a misunderstanding. I'm positive we can talk it out. Lots of supposed Chaos activity in this area; they see a bunch of heavily armed lads walking on, you know how it is." Fob turned to stand. "I say!" he yelled as he began to walk towards the traitor guardsmen. _


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## Giant Fossil Penguin

'But Brother James; your legs orf!'
'Now, now, Brother Terence, that _is_ a big gun that chap is wielding. Doubtless his finger slipped. Besides, it's only one leg- lucky I have a spare, what?!'
'James, you are a card! Should we say something?'
'Well, it's only manners. He mightn't realise how dangerous that gun is. I say, Old Chap!'

GFP


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## TheSpore

What about the corporate chapter? The weild the the power briefcase and where the neck tie of solitude. Main Colors corprate gray and navy blue for librarians, and charcoal gray w/ red tie for chaplains that wield the holy coffee mug of the emperor. 

Favorite tactic - Sue the pants off the enemy for every battle brother fallen in battle or in the court room...


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## C'Tan Chimera

Oh my god, that's brilliant. 

"In the name of the Emperor, we summon you to the Court of Righteous Privatized Justice for your crimes of infringing upon the Emperor's property!"


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## Androxine Vortex

What about the Meme chapter or the lulz marines?

They are all equiped with Shoop-da-Woop cannons

Their power level is over 9000

They can at any time duplicate their waepons power by reciting the ancient incantation, "Yo dawg i herd u liek guns so we put a gun on yo gun so you can shoot while u shoot!"

They can infiltrate any base and then mock them by saying "all your base are belong to us"

They try to cut off the city they are attacking resources and so destroy the trains with the monorail cat

Before they pull of a head shot they yell "garbage day!"

They have the ability to prove all their foe's attempts to do anything folly with Trolling upgrades

They all upgrade their thunder hammers to banhammers (with power able to ban warp beasts)

If they become surrounded and need a tactical retreat they can summon forth the ROFL copter and then they proceed to "get to the choppa"

And just when the enemy thinks they have won, they get Rick Roll'd and get virus bombed by entering “UP UP, DOWN DOWN, LEFT RIGHT, LEFT RIGHT, B, A, START" into the command panel.

In soviet russia, lol marines lol at you! 
SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI SOI


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## TheSpore

The Emo chapter oh wait i forgot they already have one the Doom Eagles.


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## TheSpore

TheSpore said:


> The Emo chapter oh wait i forgot they already have one the Doom Eagles.


Also the Sock Thieves Traitor Legion 

They invade Imp. outpost just for their socks because in the 41st M socks are on short supply.

Adeptus Soritas Order of the Red Rage - They only go to battle once a month


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## zerachiel76

Brings this sketch to mind (by Eddie Izzard I think)

"Sah sah the rebels sah they're here."
"My god man, do you think they want tea?"
"I think it's a bit more serious than that Sah, they've brought a flag"


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## LukeValantine

Best marine chapter ever, dare I say they have more character then 50% of the actual armies.


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## C'Tan Chimera

Just got another boxed set of Dark Angels veterans-I absolutely love these guys, but have never actually used them for, well, Dark Angels. 

I'm gonna fluff 'em up, paint them and see what I think. If I like what I come up with I may very well purchase a battleforce and whip up a small Reasonable Marine force.


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## C'Tan Chimera

Just dug up another gold nugget of Reasonable Marine fluff, this time detailing how they handle chaos based Heresy.

*==BEGIN TRANSMISSION==*

(A light flicks on, glaring in the face of the prisoners. Shadowy sillouettes move closer.)

Inquisitor: SUBJECT A, YOU ARE ACCUSED OF HERESY. HOW DO YOU PLEAD?

Heretic: Look, I... this is all a big misunderstanding.

Inquisitor: SUBJECT A, ARE YOU COMFORTABLE? WOULD YOU LIKE SOME COFFEE?

Heretic: Look, I already told you I... wait, what?

Inquisitor: THESE METAL CHAIRS, THEY CAN GET REALLY COLD. HERE'S YOUR COFFEE. NOW, ABOUT THESE CHAOS CULT BOOKS WE FOUND... WE'RE...

Heretic: They're not mine! I'm telling you... oh god, please don't kill me!

Inquisitor: WE'RE CONCERNED THAT THEY REPRESENT REPRESSED ANGER OR A LACK OF SELF CONFIDENCE, PERHAPS A CRY FOR ATTENTION. HAVE YOU CONSIDERED COUNCILING? WE HAVE A NICE PROGRAM HERE, WITH A FREE COMPLIMENT OF SPAS.

Heretic: ....

Inquisitor: VERY WELL, WE SENTENCE YOU TO 90 DAYS OF COUNCILING AND CHAOTIC REHAB. REMEMBER, CITIZEN, THE EMPEROR LOVES YOU, SO YOU SHOULD LOVE YOURSELF.

*==END TRANSIMISSION==*


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## Phoebus

That's more an Ordo Reasonablus (should such a thing exist...) nugget, though, isn't it?


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## C'Tan Chimera

...Hm, I guess you're right. Same general vibe, though- Reasonable Marines deal with rebellions in a -you guessed it- reasonable manner.

_"Chaos works by playing on quite normal desires common to all of humanity, so by deprogramming chaos cultists and providing them with reasonable outlets for those desires they won't feel any need to act out in future."_

Combined with their lack of religious zealotry and reverent loyalty displayed by most other Chapters, people can't figure out whether it's possible they could cross paths with a Chaos legion and not chew eachother's faces off.


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## Smokes

Witch-Hunter Tyrus: WHAT THE F***?

Inquisitor Andy: Hello good sir. It appears as if this conflict that has preceded and superseded our involved efforts upon this planet can be resolved simply by this. I am an Inquisitor of the Ordo Reasonablus.

Witch-Hunter Tyrus: I DO NOT RECOGNIZE THIS ORDO NOR DO I BELIEVE YOU. WHY WOULD YOU BLASPHEME THE EMPEROR? THIS CHILD IS ACCUSED OF SLEEPING DURING CHURCH AND SHALL BE EXECUTED.

Inquisitor Andy: My good...man. I do say does your power armor get uncomfortable? I've looked into requisitioning a piece for myself but I have certain quandaries in the fitting and overall comfort.

Witch-Hunter Tyrus:....I DO NOT UNDERSTAND.

Inquisitor Helen: If I may intercede mentlegen, Tyrus, perhaps if you were to lessen the sheer volume of your voice you could perhaps understand us.

Witch-Hunter Tyrus: BUT ALL I DO IS SCREAM AND YELL. I KNOW NO OTHER WAY.


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## C'Tan Chimera

Finished my force commander last night- I'll get WIP pictures up soon enough but I can tell you right now it's strangely hilarious. He's marching steadily toward the enemy with his massive gun lowered and his out outstretched as if to say "STOP- I JUST WANT TO TALK WITH YOU FOR A MOMENT"


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## TheSpore

wow this is some funny stuff.


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## Karak The Unfaithful

It's very funny
However isn't this kinda taking the mick out of British people? We don't all talk like: "what ho old boy! fancy some tea" only the fancy people like the lords, dukes, the queen etc etc.

Although, I gotta admit we do drink heck of alot of tea.


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## Jackinator

It's just for a laugh mate

Their battle hymn
Monty Python :laugh:
Always look on the bright side of life
[whistle]
Always look on the light side of life
[whistle]


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## C'Tan Chimera

Karak The Unfaithful said:


> It's very funny
> However isn't this kinda taking the mick out of British people? We don't all talk like: "what ho old boy! fancy some tea" only the fancy people like the lords, dukes, the queen etc etc.
> 
> Although, I gotta admit we do drink heck of alot of tea.


The Classy Marines? I didn't make the guys, I should warn you and I wouldn't worry anyways because it's not meant to be offensive or anything. All in the name of silliness is all.


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## TheSpore

Jackinator said:


> It's just for a laugh mate
> 
> Their battle hymn
> Monty Python :laugh:
> Always look on the bright side of life
> [whistle]
> Always look on the light side of life
> [whistle]


Eh the SPAM song is better.

I love joke chapters because you can come up with some wild stuff i gotta here at work that is tring to convince me to make the mafioso orks.


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## Karak The Unfaithful

its good, i find it very funny I'd just thought I'd mention it so you guys don't get too carried away. but apart from that carry on.


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## TheSpore

The Plubmers chapter- Hey its a dirty job but some one has to it.

Abbadon's Shamed - Removed for parading the battlefield in pink tutus


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## Bane_of_Kings

That just made my day, fantastic stuff :victory:.


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## TheSpore

The shirtless chater- excommunicated for starring in the twilight saga
The Pitiful Pedophiles- No child is safe in the 41st millinium when these guy invade an imp. world
Santa's Legion- I hope you kids have been good this year. Battle cry. HO HO HO! Home Planet: The North Pole of Terra
The Coffee Drinkers- Sucessor of the BA. For the Love of god don't let them drink coffee. For they will suffer the black rage.
The Space Poodles- Successor of the Space Wolves


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## Davidicus 40k

Androxine Vortex said:


> What about the Meme chapter or the lulz marines?


I know who their Primarch is.


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## SonOfStan

Funny stuff. I've always wondered what it'd be like if there was a Space Marine chapter that actually used camoflauge...or had, you know, load-bearing equipment so they could carry more ammunition/equipment into battle...or had actual buttstocks for their bolters, which would probably make them a lot more effecient when it comes to aiming at and hitting a target at range. That sort of thing.


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