# For Kreig



## RavenGuard123 (Jun 6, 2009)

Alright this is the start of my piece of writhing based arond the siege of vraks






 FOR KRIEG!!! 
An Imperial Guard short story


Lieutenant Kierkegaard stood upon the fire step in the trench and started into the bombarded wasteland. Far across he could see the see the citadel of Vraks. Its walls scared from two years constant assault. Both heretic and Krieg littered the ground surrounding Vraks. Kierkegaard looked around at the emotionless of his men an smiled he turned looking upon the citadel once more, he raised his chain sword and the hum like music to his ears he raised his bolt pistol and shouted ‘FOR KRIEG’ thousands of guardsmen poured out of the trenches towards the heretic line hundreds died within a few minutes as las shots flew over and back. Shells sang through the air and exploded in a deadly ballad of destruction, men were ripped apart by heavy bolters and motor rounds. ‘Yes’ smiled Kierkegaard this was the Krieg way.
Guardsman Pavel ran with all his might. He struggled to hold of his las-gun, Its weight to great for the boy of sixteen summers. He kept pace but only just in the distance he could see Sergeant Oswald and ahead of him Lt. Kierkegaard. The traitor line grew ever closer as he saw Kierkegaard leap into the heretic trench followed by veterans of the Death Korps. His las-gun got heavier as he neared the trench, this was the boys first taste of battle. Pavel jumped into the bloody fray las-gun slung across his back and chain sword in hand.
Kierkegaard swung his chain sword and ripped the traitor apart. His bolter pistol ammo was depleted in the early stages of the gory melee. All around he saw the Death Korps live up to their name as the last few heretics were cut down, cheers erupted from those left alive an many mourning the passing of their comrades. Kierkegaard sat down and took a little respite he was joined by Sergeant Oswald who sat with a grin on his face


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## Shogun_Nate (Aug 2, 2008)

Good start bud! Hope to see more soon!

Good luck and good gaming,

Nate


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## Mabrothrax (May 19, 2009)

You're off to a good start there. 

A few things to think about - try to improve the flow of the story by avoiding sudden shifts in the descriptions. One moment Pavel's struggling with a lasgun, then, out of nowhere, has a chainsword in his hand!

If you don't already, write in Word (or whatever) first to help iron-out spelling and other mistakes, also reading your work aloud to yourself will give you a good idea of how well it reads and flows.

Keep it up! k:


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## The_Inquisitor (Jul 19, 2008)

A good start to a promising theme. However, have you considered expanding on the details. You could go into far more depth during the trench assault. 

L.


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## World Eater XII (Dec 12, 2008)

gotta love the DKK! cant wait to read more.


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## waltzmelancholy_07 (Sep 30, 2008)

Nice work... But please do check you typhos... Expecting more:grin:...


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## Mabrothrax (May 19, 2009)

waltzmelancholy_07 said:


> Nice work... But please do check you *typhos*... Expecting more:grin:...


:alcoholic:


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## waltzmelancholy_07 (Sep 30, 2008)

:laugh:.... Hey, I'm only human:victory:....


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## The_Inquisitor (Jul 19, 2008)

Now that is some high quality irony.


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## Shogun_Nate (Aug 2, 2008)

It's high quality something! :biggrin:


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