# Every Cloud has a Mechanical Lining



## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Prologue

This story is set in 2030's Tokyo, specifically 2034. It's set in a world where most are cyberised. The term ‘cyberisation’ means that parts of their body are replaced in order to improve their physical state, i.e. their own brains being replaced with ‘mechanical implants.’ 

It follows the story of a cyborg special agent called Batou who works for an agency called public security section 9. He works with numerous people, for example his collegue Togusa who is mostly still human and also works for section 9. The story starts with his dwelling upon the loss of his female partner in crime, The Major (Motoko Kusanagi) who was also the unrequited love of his life, but will soon unfold to explain about his forgotten unspoken of military past and how it's made him arise to what he is now. A 'Ghost' is defined diffrently in this as it is the persons own conciousness, or soul, in which in some cases once the physica body dies, can flow freely through the Net (sort of the internet) until a new body is found or at their own free will. this is very rare however. 

My stimulous for writing this piece is the japanese anime and manga, Ghost in the Shell, by Shirow Masamune. This story compliments the actual anime however is completely original in its entiry.


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Every Cloud has a Mechanical Lining

Chapter 1

I

I’d forgotten most of my past until just recently. I live everyday like it’s my last. 

I’ve never let my past hang over on me like a heavy burden and allow it to affect my line of work, that’s Togusa’s job. A fine man is Togusa, although I still feel he lets his personal life interfere with his job too much, yet it’s not my area to criticise, he has a family, a wife and two children. That’s more than me. What do I have? My lazy basset hound Gabriel, that’s it. Nevertheless Togusa’s undoubtedly changed since he joined Public Security Section Nine four years ago. He’s blossomed into a fine leader and I’m proud to have him as a colleague, however, he’ll never be able to replace the Major. Ever since she passed away life’s been hell for me. For the other members of Section Nine, although it still lives deep down inside of them, they’ve chewed and swallowed the matter. 

Me on the other hand, I’m still chewing and will be for the rest of my life. Every night I dream of her return. I know she’s out there, swimming around in the ‘Net. Her ghost calls out to me every night I swear. How I hope she will return to this earth. No one can replace her, especially not in my life. Section Nine’s never been the same since that heart breaking event. It’s said it’s impossible for a cyborg to dream however recently my head has been flooded with emotions no one would expect a cyborg to have let alone me knowing myself. 

Are these emotions real? Or if not are they just apart of my dreams? However the question arises, if a cyborg cannot dream, how could these emotions be apart of my dreams? A complex looping paradox is forming in which even I can’t solve at this present moment. It frustrates me to think about it. The bottom line is, I loved the Major, she was the only thing that kept me going, kept me alive, and now she’s gone, I feel empty, so I empty that I even question why I carry on with my life. Why did I go through with the whole prosthetics operation in order to become what I can? Why didn’t I just die on the battlefield like the rest of my men? I’ve seen many horrific things in my life including the massacre of my own platoon when I was in the rangers. But the Major’s death tops everything.


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

Not bad Aaron good first try  i like the way its written, like its just rolling through his thought process. Have some rep


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter 1

II

I said to myself never to speak of my past again or allow it to cross my mind again. Those days were dead and gone. Nothing can change what’s happened. Just the way I want them to stay. But recently everything has come flooding back to me. It’s as if the Major’s death has been the trigger to the remembrance of my forgotten past. 

A sudden chill ran down my spine as the piercing sound of my door bell rang out. I inquisitively made my way over to the door. It let out a cold creaking noise as it opened. It was only Togusa. He stood tall in front of me, but his head still didn’t reach my shoulder. He leant back and shook his head from side to side. His shaggy mullet like hair swayed followed by the eruption of water from its ends, like a dog shaking water off after a bath. Apparently it must have been raining outside. I hadn’t realised. I’d just been sat around all day dwelling upon the past events in my life. All I ever did on my days off. I moved aside and Togusa stepped inside carrying two large, paper grocery bags. His eyes scanned his surrounding.

”I got you this, thought you may need some, looks like you haven’t been out for a few days.”
He passed one of the bags over to me and I happily accepted the gift after viewing what was inside. It was full of dog food for Gabriel, and the right food at that. She’s very picky about her food. She’ll only eat the fresh stuff. If it’s not she’ll sit around and sniff it as if to show interest but after a few minutes she’ll push it aside. 

But thankfully, Togusa knew me and her well, and bought the right kind. At this point Gabriel had already traipsed into the kitchen and sat by her bowl, her tail violently wagging, waiting for me to provide the goods. I slowly turned and did as she wished, at which point she planted her face straight into the wet, brown mush.


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

Good but you really need to break up your writing, because it will put some people off with it being in a big chunk aaron.  its good though keep it up


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

broken up slightly. does it need more?


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter 1

III

Togusa instantly knew something was wrong with me because of the way I trudged around the kitchen. He’d known for the last year what was wrong with me for the past year now, but it was a taboo subject between us Section Niners. He knew that I was most affected by it. He knew exactly what was wrong, but still innocently asked. 
“What’s wrong Boss man, you’ve been down for months now” he asked me.

I shrugged at this remark and strolled into the living room once again before slouching back into my hardened armchair. Togusa followed and placed himself on the armchair opposite me. He looked up at me and stared into my grey circular eyes with sympathy.

“You still miss the Major don’t you? Look Batou, I know how you feel, we all feel the same, however I do know how much more you were attached to her than the rest of us. Section Nine’s fallen apart since her death, but we do all need to be strong and move on. It hurts me to see you how you are at this present time Batou. You’re the backbone behind Section Nine. I understand no one will ever be able to replace her but we need to try and move on in our lives. One day she may return to us however, none of us are sure of that. For now, all we can do is hope.” 

He reached out and placed his own hand on top of mine. The warm touch upon my cold metal shell made me tense up. I retreated backwards pressing my head back against the chair so I could no longer feel its smooth velvety texture, but now the harder uncomfortable casing that held the structure together. I sighed heavily before replying.

“I loved her Togusa...” I admitted quietly. 
“...Work just...” I sighed again
“...Isn’t the same without her presence. I have no motivation anymore. Everyday I return home and simply throw myself down in this chair and hope her Ghost whispers to me. I feel it does, but how can I be sure? I may just be imagining it, but I like to think it real.”

In saying this, my arm started to tremble. Togusa held it steadily for a moment, before removing it completely. He offered making me a coffee, in which I declined before picking up his keys from the coffee table. He walked into the kitchen and removed two beers form the fridge and threw one in my direction.

“Right, I must dash as I’m still on call with the Chief. A new case has cropped up. Nothing too serious but since you’re out of work I said I’d cover for you. The chief worries about you too Batou. I’ll hopefully see you Monday Boss man, unless something more serious crops up between now and then. Take care of yourself Batou.” 
And with that comment he made his way over to the front door and saw himself out.
“Thanks Togusa” I cried out as he left.


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

starting to take form aaron. Its a nice change to have some non 40k fiction up( i no its a 40k site but hey  )


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## waltzmelancholy_07 (Sep 30, 2008)

I like the story and your motivation... But... Why post it here?... In this forum?...


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## Commissar Ploss (Feb 29, 2008)

Why not? Exposure is exposure! If someone is already satisfied with other parts of the site, why not see what the comments for the fiction section are like. We're a great bunch here all around. This is strategically called the "Original Works" forum, not the "40k Original Works" forum. I encourage all types of writing here. Thats why there is the option of listing your story as Warhammer 40,000; Fantasy; or Other. As fond as i am of the first two choices, the last one makes me the happiest. Because if people are posting their "Other" stories here, it means the mentality of "oh, these guys wont be interested in my writing because its not 40k," is going away! :yahoo: And thats a step in the right direction if you ask me. 

Commissar Ploss

btw, great work so far, i love the whole Ghost in the Shell (not just the pictures) feel to it. Was that your model for this story?


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

I agree with CP as i said earlier its nice to see other writings in this section, it has the option of other for a good reason and allows people who don't write or just don't feel comfortable somewhat writing about 40k. I think its going great so far and i know you have that little A4 pad of writing to type up yet aaron  hurry up and get it on (Y)


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

hahaa, will do Ste. and ye CP my stimulous is GitS, my stories set between the first two films with a bit of Stand Alone Complex material but my story itself is original. its jsut exploring Batou's emotions


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter 1

IV

All alone. Once again. The flickering of the flames in the fire place was the only source of movement in the room. Even Gabriel was now slouched in front of the fire now, lying perfectly still. I tried to clear my mind. I tried to think what my life would have been like without the Major, but everywhere I looked seemed to remind me of her. Her memory was so vibrant and fresh that there was no covering it up. I had tried so many times.

I threw the can Togusa had passed to me aside and stood up. I walked towards the mantle piece, sighing as I went. Gabriel sensed my movement and her ears pricked up, but soon after realised I wasn’t doing anything of importance and drooped back down. 

I reached out for a small crystal encrusted box the mantle piece held. Inside was a small rectangular watch. This was the very watch I secretly bought her many years ago. This was one of the first signs of my love towards her. This was the only remnant I have left of her. I flipped the watch over and on the back was ‘Maj. Motoko Kusanagi, with love.’ 

On the night of her death that name was the only sequence of words I howled out. Thousands of times. Over and over again. ‘Motoko’ I cried out. But I knew at that point nothing was going to bring her back. To this day I still wondered if she knew it was me who had bought her this relic. I missed her. Her soft purple hair, her burning red eyes, glowing like torch flames lighting up the night sky.

I curled the petite watch around my fingers before lifting it towards my mouth and planting a single delicate kiss onto its face. It’s a shame I never did that to the real deal when I had he chance. I sighed deeply once again before returning the watch to its abode and carefully placed it back onto the mantle piece. 

Above it was a small Polaroid picture of me with one of my bulky arms wrapped around the Major’s shoulder. We were both smiling. Her eyes stared right out of the picture and into my own. Those eyes still haunted me to this say. I winced away. The emotions started to hit the back of my throat. I made my way back over to my chair and slouched back. How I wish a cyborg could cry. It would be so much easier for me to let out of my emotions, because all they’re doing now is building up inside of me and killing me from within.

I placed a pillow behind my head; I soon drifted off to sleep.


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

Looking good Aaron. Its also a nice change for it to be 1st person rather than 3rd. I did a long story in 1st person and enjoyed it as a change


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## waltzmelancholy_07 (Sep 30, 2008)

Well at least my worries for you mate will never come true... CP has seen to that...

Cause back then, I posted Advent in a Warcraft forum... And the members barely gave it any attention...

But with Ste, Ploss and me anticipating your works... I doubt you'll suffer the same predicament as I did... 

So keep it up!...


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

thanks for the support, its much appreciated


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

No problem aaron  Ploss & waltz are really good with help on the original works area and i do my bits and pieces of work to  theres a great community for OW on heresy  so get your next piece up matey


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter 1

V

I started to dream again. I was running towards a large building. The moon light shone down on the glass roof above and the sound of the waves crashed against the cliff it stood on. A peaceful night it seemed. 

I strolled inside to find a long corridor ahead. I strode down the lengthy corridor. The path was damp with many grime filled puddles scattered along it. A sudden splashing noise sounded behind me. I rapidly turned and whipped my handgun from its holster. Small ripples appeared and soon disappeared on a puddle close to be however, nothing was to be seen. I re- holstered my weapon and continued on my mysterious search through the darkness.

I turned corners on numerous occasions. The twisting path was some what confusing and frustrating. It seemed to be build as a time-consuming tormenting maze. The way was lit by ancient torches hanging from the walls. I wonder who lit them. Questions like this filled my head. Why are there puddles? Why is it so dark? But most importantly why am I here? 

I soon reached a large wooden door. Solid oak it felt like to the touch. I looked down to discover no handle. I pushed hard against it, but this was no use. The door did not want to budge for me. I tried this several times. Still no success. 

I pulled out my handgun again and shot at it from various angles, first towards where the handle was supposed to be and then in a clockwise arrangement until my clip was empty. Each time I pulled the trigger the bullet simply ricocheted off of the wood. This was strange. How could this be happening? To the feel it was solid oak. A single shot should blow a clean hole straight through, but it simply doesn’t. 

In frustration I threw my whole body weight against it. A sharp piercing scream jutted out from the other side. An unexpected burst of light shone from a small crack in the bottom of the door. I fell down to my knees and looked through the fracture in the wood. 

I gasped at what I saw. Directly in front of the door lay a woman. She seemed fairly young with purple hair and a well rounded chest. I recognised her instantly. It was the Major. Although it was unlikely that she would scream in a situation like this it was undoubtedly her.

She noticed my intense stare. At this she pronounced a single word. 
‘Batou...’

A red laser shone down from the sky above. It stirred around for a while before meeting between her eyes.

‘SHIT’ I cried out and as doing so I threw myself once more at the door to find it burst open. But I was too late. A single click from above and her head exploded right in front of my eyes. Once again I dropped to my knees. I cradled her body and the remains of her head in my hands. The emotional pain hit me square in the chest. Why can’t a cyborg cry? Why? I gripped her body towards mine and buried my head into the back of her neck. 

That single gun shot echoed through my mind...


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter One

VI

I abruptly awoke. I raised my hands in front of my face searching for blood. Nothing. Gabriel was now lying on my lap. I relaxed my back against the pillow then averted my gaze to the clock. Ten minutes past five it read. The fire now consisted of a few small embers which would soon extinguish themselves. I thought back trying to remember my dream. Fragments of it remained, but enough to tell me that I’d had that same dream before. 

Regardless of this, that sound still haunts me. A split second long, but its effects offer a life times worth of nightmares. These dreams did resemble the actual event but will never compare to the horror of the real thing. That day destroyed me. It destroyed my world.

Maybe my mind was playing tricks on me, or parts of my memory had become corrupt. Although having a Mechanical brain can be problematic. Sure, it is has its advantages, but even small problems such as file corruption can be a real pain in the ass, let alone the much bigger problems such as being hacked into. Or it could be some sick bastard playing tricks on me. How I scorn them if they are doing so. I sighed heavily.

Being a top agent myself however, I would sense if something fishy was to occur such as the implantation of false memories. I swear these dreams are real and my own mind is creating them. They must be trying to telling me something. In saying this I leapt up out of my chair and punched the wall nearest to me. I obtained no damage to my fist, but the wall now had a nice rounded fissure embedded in it. 

My head dropped and my violent breathing soon settled to a much calmer pattern. In this sudden up rise Gabriel had been thrown off my lap and landed on the floor next to me. She looked up at me with her kind eyes. I bent down and stroked her between her ears, at which point she rolled onto her back with her legs pointing in the air, waiting for her belly to be tickled. I did as she wished then strolled over the window.

I drew my antique moth-eaten curtains and the sun brightly beamed down upon. Its optimistic look aggravated me instantly, so slammed them back shut again. Gabriel looked up at me bewildered. Another deep sigh passed. I’m more of a winter person. I prefer the cold, dark mornings especially in my current state of mind. I relate better to winter. But nonetheless, nature is nature there is no saying or stopping what it is going to do next. We just have to live with that.

I slumped through my apartment. I picked up Gabriel’s dog lead and my jacket before returning to the living room. I looked around. Gabriel was no where to be seen.


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## Ste (Aug 28, 2008)

good work


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter One

VII

I searched my apartment from top to bottom. She was nowhere. I sat back and though where she could be. Bingo. I ran into my bedroom and dropped to the floor. There, curled up behind numerous boxes, lay Gabriel with her flapping ears covering her eyes. Canine nature bewilders me. ‘If I can’t see them, then they can’t see me.’ Strange, strange creatures. Lazy mutt. I pulled her out by her collar, then quickly strapped on her lead and dragged her out of the room before she could return to her hiding place.

I stepped out side my apartment. The musty smell of the dirty corridor hit the back of my throat instantly. The block of flats seemed quiet. To be honest though, it was still exceedingly early. I reached the front doors of the building and pressed the buzzer on the door. The door automatically swung open and a sudden burst of fresh air cleared my throat of the stale dry taste. A new day has begun.

The bird’s songs echoed all around me. At the end of the long street the glow of the rising sun shone. The light breeze blew my pony tail back and forth. There was no one to be seen for miles around. The streets were bare. The city’s rush hour hadn’t started yet, but I knew it soon would. 

I strolled around the meandering streets in the suburbs, tugging Gabriel as we went to stimulate her movement. The idle dog refused to move most of the time, but without walks she’d simply just get bigger than she already is. I’m glad for being a cyborg sometimes, because if I wasn’t I certainly wouldn’t be able to carry this mutt in her current condition.

The vets had often said that I spoil her too much and it’s bad for her health, but what can I do. She’s my only companion. She needs to be spoilt for me to feel appreciation. So now I just make sure I walk her everyday and don’t cut corners when doing so. Long walks are good for me and her. 
She gets her exercise, and I get my share of fresh air for the day.

Her wide eyes stared at me blankly as we approached the park. I unhooked Gabriel’s lead expecting her to run out into the vast open field. She simply trotted over to the nearest tree and lay in the shade panting. I stood tall scanning the area with my examining eyes. The light of the sun reflected off of the distant sky scrapers creating a glaring downgrading effect down on the city below.


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter One

VIII

The bird’s songs suddenly halted. A spine tingling chill ran down my back. Gabriel came bounding up to me. This was the fastest I’d ever seen her run. She cowered next to my leg. Something was up. 

Out of the blue, a single gun shot sounded out from a within the city. Although its echo sounded distant I reacted instantly. My cyber brain locked on to the most likely place of its occurrence judging by the speed and distance that the sound had reached me. I broke in to a sprint, dragging Gabriel along side me. 

Out of the park and back into the city, my internal satellite navigation system from within my cyber brain had guided me towards a dark, dank alleyway. I crept forwards and pulled my fully automatic Glock 33 handgun from its holster hidden under the back of my shirt held in place by the tight waist line of my jeans. I released Gabriel’s lead from my grasp and quietly whispered “stay.”
I can’t fault that dog’s loyalty. She quietly crept behind a near trash can. She lay down and let out a vast silent yawn, before making herself comfortable in her own company.

I continued forwards. My gun was held in my right hand with my index finger lightly pressed against the trigger. I tiptoed forwards until I reached a ninety degree corner. I aligned my back with it and silently exhaled. I counted to three before bursting out of cover and around the corner. ‘Freeze!’ I yelled. I looked around to see nothing but I cat throwing itself from the top of a bin and sprinting down the alley as fast as its legs could carry it and out into the main road opposite. There was no other movement. 

I had got here in good time. If there were any criminals then they would not have managed to escape. I delayed for a short period of time before returning my handgun to its holster. I sharply turned and retreated back to retrieve Gabriel. She lay there curled up exactly where I left her, dozing away peaceful. 

Was my mind playing tricks on me? Was the gunshot real? Or a figment of my imagination? Is it the haunting of my subconscious mind, developing from my dreams? A single gun shot killed the Major, and in this situation it was the sound of a single gun shot that made me react. Was this shot real or is this my mind still dwelling on that single shot that took the love of my life’s life. Is she calling out to me? Her Ghost is still out there. 

I’m no expert on the philosophy behind the definition of a Ghost. Many philosophers believe a ‘Ghost’ to be is colloquial slang for an individual's consciousness and that it is the only thing differentiates a human being from a biological robot. Regardless of how much biological material is replaced with electronic or mechanical substitutes, as long as individuals retain their ghost, they retain their humanity and individuality. 

So in my eyes, it’s a form of mechanical soul. Therefore no matter how much of your body becomes prosthetic it will always be there inside of you. As people die, their Ghost also dies, but some people are special. The Major was one of these people. She always quoted how her Ghost whispered to her, like gut instinct. She has to return. She must!


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter One

IX

I found myself sinking back against the wall, its uneven bricks jabbed me in the back as I dropped. She’s gone, and I had to come to terms with that. But it’s too hard to swallow. So many people have vanished out of my life over the years. My parents, my ranger squadron in South America, and now the Major. I’ve had many close calls myself. I’ve stared death right in the face and still turned my back on it, but it’s the loss of those around you that affect you the most.

Some times I wonder why my life had been spared in those situations and why those I loved had been take instead. All alone, in this cruel world.

My head dropped down. Gabriel walked over to me and simply licked my cold face. I cracked a small smile before placing my hand on her head and ruffled her head vigorously. I ran my hand up and down her back. She wagged her tail rapidly and my smile widened into a grin. At least I’ve still got Gabriel. She may be lazy and picky about her food but she’s always been there for me, ever since she was an abandoned puppy in which I took pity on. 

She moved herself onto my lap and wriggled around until she got herself comfy. I looked up to see the sun beaming down onto me over head, reflecting off Gabriel’s golden brown fur. I lay still for a second before placing my head down onto Gabriel’s. Gabriel yawned and I sighed. Both owner and pet alike. Both lonely in this world. None of us feel another’s love. Only the love we show each other.

I lay there for a few moments before pulling myself up again. Gabriel had woken up abruptly. We both stood tall and started out trek back to the apartment. Movement had started in and around the city. Cars slowly congested along the long linear roads. Many shops began to release their shutters. This day’s life had begun. 

On the way back I called into Starchild coffee shop. Gabriel traipsed through the door behind me with her head held low to avoid suspicion. It wasn’t like she was going to attract much attention anyway, but she kept her head down anyway out of courtesy. I stood by the bar and ordered a double latte. The barmaid followed my orders and got to work. 

I scanned the room with my eyes to notice a single other person. A middle ages man by appearance was seated at one of the corner tables towards the back of the shop. He sat drinking a regular coffee and held the daily newspaper in his hands, lowering it every few minutes to sip his coffee and give me a glance of his appearance. Either he wasn’t yet cyberised or he still enjoyed the act of physically reading the paper medium. 

Everyday the daily news would be downloaded directly into my Cyber brain, and today was no different. I starred at the man for a few more seconds before searching through the day’s articles. Nothing much was happening in the world at the present though. Bank scandals and celebrity home affairs made up the majority of the day’s front cover news. No mention of issues concerning public security or terrorism. This certainly kept my mind at rest. 

However if there were any issues, Togusa and the team would have already briefed me about them. I probably wouldn’t be in here right now if a more serious case was occurring, I’d be at HQ, with the rest of my team. But again, for now, nothing of importance is occurring, leaving me in peace on my day off to spend quality time with my lazy mutt Gabriel. 
‘To happy, happy days.’ And with that I raised my cup up high.


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## azay04 (Feb 26, 2010)

Chapter One

X

I rotated my stool back around, so that I was now facing the bar again. I place my piping hot latte back on its saucer and looked down at Gabriel. She lay curled up at my feet, panting once again after another short burst of exercise. Languid dog. 

The steam from the latte rose up and condensed against my cool forehead. I reached out and grasped the sugar shaker and slowly tilted it so a sharp stream of sugar flowed from its tip. I picked up the spoon form the side of my plate and stirred wildly so the cup’s content just touched the brim. The swirling white circles that that sat on its surface curled around rapidly, rotating around and around, in a hypnotic like fashion. 

I regained consciousness from my trance and took the first hot sip from my latte. The burning feeling of this initial mouthful flowed freely down my throat. 

Refreshing as it was, my sense of taste was nothing compared to what it used to be. A key problem of owning prosthetics is your natural human taste buds, unless you still own your organic tongue, simply cease to exist. Cyborgs can still eat normal human food but it doesn’t have the same nostalgic taste as it did previously. But still the effect it did give was better than eating or drinking the specially modified, synthetic, cyborg crap. No taste satisfaction, just a higher energy boost. 

I lifted the caramel coffee biscuit from the side of my saucer and careful removed it from its delicate wrapper. I lifted the biscuit towards my watering mouth, but soon stopped and sighed. The biscuit was held in mid air. Gabriel’s head had been following my hand and starring at the biscuit ever since I touched the wrapper. I dropped the biscuit to the floor and she soon consumed all hat remained of it. She was still natural, so her taste buds would have benefited from it more than I would have. This made me feel good inside.

I picked up my coffee and blew it the uprising steam it gave off. I took another cautious sip. Once again the hot liquid comfortably charred the inside of my throat. I waited a few moments before taking the next. The burning sensation had the same effect as earlier but now my throat had gotten used to it. The body truly is an amazing thing. The way it can immediately adapt to its surrounding. 

But there is one ting that the body cannot adapt too. Something that is so emotionally overpowering that the body just cannot handle it. Even with a cyber brain the body still cannot cope. 

The excruciating emotional pain caused by the death of those close to you was enough to make you completely shut down. For time after such an event the host locks them self away from the outside world.

However, most people soon overcome this feeling and continue with their lives like nothing has happened. They don’t forget about the deceased but they do all they can to cover up the empty void that is left by them. Others on the other hand, dwell on the matter for the rest of there lives, thinking about the departed and don’t make any effort to cover up the matter. Every day they wake, and remember then spend the rest of their lives living in a severe state of depression over it all.

This is where my dilemma emerges. Am I going to be one of these people who dwell on the matter for my entire life, which awakens everyday and instantly fall into a depressive state? Or do I finally come to terms with the fact that the Major is gone and never returning? Nevertheless, she will never be forgotten. She will always be there. Whispering to me. Telling me to keep living my life. She’s the Ghost in my own Shell!


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