# Bats%*t Crazy Theories



## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

Following Serpion5's advice, cos I did a boo boo in his thread, sorry mate!
After the Thread which shall not be named, anyone want to let us in on some really stupid theories they have heard in relation to 40k?
No flaming or trolling please, it's just a bit of fun to see what stupid things people have come up with in the past.

To get the ball rolling when I was new to the hobby, way back in the day I had a friend who was convinced that Harlequins were the manifestation of the fifth Chaos God, the Solitaire!
Where this theory came from I never found out, he never backed it up with anything but he was convinced it was real.


-EDIT-
Sorry, it was CKCrawfords thread, sorry to you too mate!


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

Norm, it was not my thread you were boobooing, but I didn`t think it was a good idea anyway.

A dedicated thread sounded... safer shall we say?

One of the best crazy theories I have heard was in regards to the gods of the warp. It actually sounded credible the first time I heard it, but knowing what I do now I can say it is false. 

Khaine = Khorne = Gork ... Apparently all the same guy by different races.

Cegorach = Tzeentch = Mork ... And here again. 

For a while, I assumed that this made sense. But after reading a few pieces of fluff in the CD codex, it can`t be true, because these gods interact with each other. 

It may be retcon, or it may be misunderstanding. Or maybe Khorne and Tzeentch have a few big fake heads stashed somewhere for other races. :biggrin:


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## Baron Spikey (Mar 26, 2008)

A crazy one I heard recently was that Asuryan escaped being killed by Slaanesh and became the being we know as the Emperor (despite the fact the Emperor had been around for close to 40,000 years before Slaanesh appeared), also the fact that the C'tan essentially run everything and that 2 of the slain Primarchs (Ferrus Manus and Konrad Curze) are not only still alive but are the avatars for 2 of the star gods.

The guy was quite condescending about his theories stating that only those people who'd read all 40k material and could read between the lines would be able to realise the same 'truths' he'd come to believe, in the end though it was just funny because he was so delusional despite no actual evidence or support.


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

That guy sounds like a looney. I wonder... never mind.


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## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

I was hoping to avoid that one but hey ho, it was going to happen!


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## ChaosJunkie (Aug 21, 2008)

I know someone who believes that the emperor was killed by Horus, so the man on the golden throne is actually Horus, and the CSMs are all the loyalists which is why they say death to the false emperor. I have no idea where he got it from


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Baron Spikey said:


> A crazy one I heard recently was that Asuryan escaped being killed by Slaanesh and became the being we know as the Emperor (despite the fact the Emperor had been around for close to 40,000 years before Slaanesh appeared), also the fact that the C'tan essentially run everything and that 2 of the slain Primarchs (Ferrus Manus and Konrad Curze) are not only still alive but are the avatars for 2 of the star gods.
> 
> The guy was quite condescending about his theories stating that only those people who'd read all 40k material and could read between the lines would be able to realise the same 'truths' he'd come to believe, in the end though it was just funny because he was so delusional despite no actual evidence or support.


Just in case someone missed it.


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## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

With a gagillion posts in about fifteen seconds I'm not sure anyone missed it, anywhere!


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## GrimzagGorwazza (Aug 5, 2010)

one of my former gaming mates used to field a mixed army of nids, marines, eldar and guardsmen claiming that he had read an article in WD about a mixed force called the merge marines. Apparently they were an allied army that could choose forces from any codex to represent the fact that they stood against everything the other races stood for....they were allied together to try and bring peace to the galaxy. 

this was back in second edition and i now realise he just wanted models from a massive selection of armies...all painted the same yellow and blue colour scheme though.


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## Smokes (Nov 27, 2009)

You want crazy? The Inquisitorial Representative sitting on the High Lords of Terra, along with many influential Inquisitor-Lords and Grandmasters (Caidin, etc.) are in fact Squats. It explains how they disappeared.


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## ckcrawford (Feb 4, 2009)

normtheunsavoury said:


> Sorry, it was CKCrawfords thread, sorry to you too mate!


Its cool:victory:

I wouldn't say that these are looney persae, but I'd say the following kind of made my brain move a bit.

1. The wounds on Sanguinus in the famous picture of the battle between Horus and the Emperor. Though its just an art piece, if you actually look at the wounds, and you were a doctor you'd think the Emperor was the one that killed Sanguinus.

2. Though it has been stated by GW that fantasy and 40k are two different worlds I always believed that somehow Sigmar was one of the lost primarchs. Hey... I believe others believe this too, so if I were to driven to mad house, I wouldn't be alone.

3. Arguleon Veq is going to punch chaos in the balls. My little theory. :laugh:

4. Some people actually think Dorn and Guilliman are still alive...

5. I heard that Horus' soul is slowly regaining its strength in the warp and some other crazy shit I saw in another website long ago. Anyhow this theory has it hes comming back... somehow...


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## Bloody Mary (Nov 6, 2009)

Cypher is actually Alpharius. 

Abbaddon keeps failing his crusades because he's secretly on the side of the Imperium.


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Ultramarines are actually the Alpha Legion, which proves their status of being masters at misdirection and deception. The real Ultramarines have been cursed by Ahriman to roam the planets within the Eye of Terror, forever disoriented and lost. Their recent combat losses have been a ruse in order to get closer to Terra so they can release the Daemon of Mars, who is not actually the Void Dragon, but a chaos mechaspawn.
Amidoinitrite?


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## Protoss119 (Aug 8, 2010)

Underneath Mars is not the Void Dragon, but Vance Stubbs' secret stash of 100 Baneblades. He just forgot where he put them, that's all.

Indrick Boreale was reincarnated shortly after the Kaurava campaign, taking the form of Abbadon's arms in the final Chaos Rising cinematic.


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## gen.ahab (Dec 22, 2009)

Fenrisian wolves are actually mutated humans.


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Protoss119 said:


> Underneath Mars is not the Void Dragon, but Vance Stubbs' secret stash of 100 Baneblades. He just forgot where he put them, that's all.


Over 9000 Baneblades.


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## MidnightSun (Feb 10, 2009)

With towers and spires of melted waffles!

Midnight


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## Protoss119 (Aug 8, 2010)

Firaeveus Carron will one day be reincarnated and lead the 14th Black Crusade in his quest for Metuhl Bawkses.


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Boxxy is an emissary of Chaos Undivided who went mad during warp transport. She is also Carron's wife.


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## rodmillard (Mar 23, 2010)

The Boz said:


> Ultramarines are actually the Alpha Legion, which proves their status of being masters at misdirection and deception.


This would actually explain why Guilleman is not listed as a Primarch in the earliest editions of the fluff...

*ducks*


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## gen.ahab (Dec 22, 2009)

I once heard a silly rumour that it is all fake, 40k never happened and it's only the 2nd mil, it was just made up by a group of nerdy British dudes a long time ago. Silly isn't it?


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Burn the heretic!


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## Smokes (Nov 27, 2009)

The Zerg are the Tyranid's cousins.


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## ThatOtherGuy (Apr 13, 2010)

I heard the chaos gods are in on 4chan... wouldn't be suprised.


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## evan82 (Sep 1, 2010)

gen.ahab said:


> I once heard a silly rumour that it is all fake, 40k never happened and it's only the 2nd mil, it was just made up by a group of nerdy British dudes a long time ago. Silly isn't it?


That is just ridiculous.


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## Protoss119 (Aug 8, 2010)

ThatOtherGuy said:


> I heard the chaos gods are in on 4chan... wouldn't be suprised.


Just as planned.


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## locustgate (Dec 6, 2009)

The chaos gods are to nice to be on 4 chan


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## ROT (Jun 25, 2010)

I once got tied up in a Heated fluff discussion about the Black Crusades, and i was loosing, in terms of Evidence supporting theory or whatever, And i somewhere managed to pull this one out of the hat:

Abaddon the despoiler is secretly leading the Tyranids to victory on terra.
:biggrin:

So yeah, the biggest Bullshit theory i've ever heard... is one i made up. So yeah. :so_happy:

:wild:


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## locustgate (Dec 6, 2009)

I wonder how many of these conspiracy nuts watch glenn beck


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## Davidicus 40k (Jun 4, 2010)

The Boz said:


> Ultramarines are actually the Alpha Legion, which proves their status of being masters at misdirection and deception.


Makes sense why everyone hates them; they *want* it that way. If they were beloved and regarded as the most honorable, most powerful, and most awesomest Chapter in the whole freakin' history of forever, they'd get a lot of crazy, curious fans that would stick their noses into places they shouldn't. Then the Ultramarines would have to cut those noses off, leading to a useless nose stash and a lot of unnecessary headache. Thus, they allow themselves to be made fun of and ridiculed, leaving them free to do their secret work.

Brilliant I say! Brilliant!


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## ckcrawford (Feb 4, 2009)

One that was created by _Angels of Darkness_ is that perhaps the fallen are actually loyalist DA and that Lion El' Johnson could have been on Horus' side if Horus had been able to wait for the DA's to arrive on Terra. 

I like this Heresy


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## piotrasdabadman91 (Nov 7, 2009)

Khorne is a reincarnation of Chuck Norris


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## Therizza (Jul 29, 2010)

I remember someone saying that there was a Space Marine squad that got lost in the warp and came out in the Warhammer fantasy world. But that was back in like 1997.


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## Mossy Toes (Jun 8, 2009)

Anything written by Revenant or LordLucan.

I mean, honestly. Seriously.

(both of these "future versions of 40k" are extremely long, so be forewarned.)

A taste sampling: Cypher is Luther('s psychic representation of guilt). Farsight's Dawnblade is really a Necron item...or was it forged by Vaul? Hive Fleet Leviathan will gradually merge with the Orks of Octavia, creating a New Devourer, far more virulent and unstoppable than the Hive Mind. The Tau, having been genetically fashioned by the Eldar, were based on Necrontyr gene-stock. The Emperor, truly the Old One Star Child, will soon die and be reborn as the fifth Chaos God, the God of Order. And far, FAR more.

These two guys have far more brilliant, fevered minds than any of us. Look on their works, ye mighty, and despair.


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## ROT (Jun 25, 2010)

The Chaos God... of .... Order?

Pah. They're all so... Brilliant... Why do they have to be so illogical... That'd be so much fun.


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## Ardias26 (Sep 26, 2008)

I dunno...I kinda like the idea of the loin being a secret traitor, or maybe just waiting to see who would win then throw in with em. From the horus heresy books he does seem to come of as having a big of a secret agenda of his own.


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## Alexikatano (Aug 24, 2009)

I heard from a GWs shop guy that Sanguinius really went over to Horus in the end, but got killed straight after. So when his Astartes get a vision of his death they realise he was a baddy and go nuts (the Black Rage):crazy:. It's also why Mephiston is so weird.


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## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

Alexikatano said:


> I heard from a GWs shop guy that Sanguinius really went over to Horus in the end, but got killed straight after. So when his Astartes get a vision of his death they realise he was a baddy and go nuts (the Black Rage):crazy:. It's also why Mephiston is so weird.


I've always been quite a fan of that theory!:angry:


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## MidnightSun (Feb 10, 2009)

The Necrons were built by Humanity to do menial tasks like make pizza, but then they went out of control because their workings got all clogged up with Mozzarella and tomato puree.

Midnight


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## Romolo (Sep 6, 2010)

A crazy idea I have.

The Emperor is the manifestation of a Warp God who is at the calm center of the warp. A "Daemon Prince" if you would say. Malcador and the Primarchs are minor Daemon Princes.


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## ckcrawford (Feb 4, 2009)

normtheunsavoury said:


> I've always been quite a fan of that theory!:angry:


Me too! We are Heretics!!!



Romolo said:


> A crazy idea I have.
> 
> The Emperor is the manifestation of a Warp God who is at the calm center of the warp. A "Daemon Prince" if you would say. Malcador and the Primarchs are minor Daemon Princes.


How would that work if some of them turned to daemon princes after the heresy? Did they turn again? 



Mossy Toes said:


> Anything written by Revenant or LordLucan.
> 
> I mean, honestly. Seriously.
> 
> ...


I liked "*Honestly*" a lot. hahaha


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## Mossy Toes (Jun 8, 2009)

ckcrawford said:


> I liked "*Honestly*" a lot. hahaha


Did you read past page one? Pages 2 and 3 are packed solid, basically every single post, with the rest of it--each post as long as the very first one.

Of course, my apologies if you have already read it all. I really admire LL's work, and was following this beast when he was first posting it. And such a mighty beast it is, too...


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## ckcrawford (Feb 4, 2009)

Mossy Toes said:


> Did you read past page one? Pages 2 and 3 are packed solid, basically every single post, with the rest of it--each post as long as the very first one.
> 
> Of course, my apologies if you have already read it all. I really admire LL's work, and was following this beast when he was first posting it. And such a mighty beast it is, too...


no, I read everything. It took me the night before and maybe a little sleep break with some coffee to finish it, but yeah I read all of it. It wasn't bad at all, just wish my favorite legion didn't get owned


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## Mossy Toes (Jun 8, 2009)

And do you agree that quite a lot of it is "Bats%*t Awesome"? Oops, I mean, "Bats%*t Crazy"?


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## ckcrawford (Feb 4, 2009)

the one thing that I thought was a bit too crazy for my tastes was the invincible great devourer created by orks and tyranid. But i did think that the the great devourer leaving the galaxy was a good idea. It further makes the reader think about what more powerful life in the 40k world is out there without saying to much. But yeah a lot of it was good though half ork and tyranid is way too crazy for me. I mean once you cut them the heal faster than you hurt them? Hurts my brain just thinking about it:russianroulette:.


Edit: oh shit... should we put "spoilers" on this thread? haha


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## Mossy Toes (Jun 8, 2009)

Hehehe...nah, we can just get them interested in reading. If you want to see more on the fusion of Ork and Nid, though, you can see a "modern 40k" view of it, by LordLucan again, here.


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## hippypancake (Jul 14, 2010)

if ork and nid fuse together to make nids MORE skilled in cc and not need the hive mind the. galaxy. is. FUCKED


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## Giant Fossil Penguin (Apr 11, 2009)

That the Emperor killed Sanguinius. The omniscient voice of our Narrator makes it quite clear that Sanguinius was dead before the Emperor reached the bridge of the Vengeful Spirit.

GFP


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Giant Fossil Penguin said:


> That the Emperor killed Sanguinius. The omniscient voice of our Narrator makes it quite clear that Sanguinius was dead before the Emperor reached the bridge of the Vengeful Spirit.
> 
> GFP


That is only what the propaganda machine of the Imperium wants you to think! 
Don't forget that it's in a document written in a skewed, Imperial point of view!


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## Aramoro (Oct 7, 2009)

I like the Theory that the whole Emperor, Primarchs etc is a fraud a massive contrivance to ensare people into slavishly following the Imperial Way. Space Marines are just your average run of the mill genetically engineered super humans , there were no Primarchs and no God Emperor. Its all a fabrication based on 10,000 years of superstition and folklore and partly a purposeful method to control the masses. 

All we know about Nid's and Necrons really are Imperial Reports about how bad they are and how widespread, when in fact they are a threat but not that bad. But a climate of fear is that much better to govern with. 

Aramoro


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## Smokes (Nov 27, 2009)

Aramoro said:


> I like the Theory that the whole Emperor, Primarchs etc is a fraud a massive contrivance to ensare people into slavishly following the Imperial Way. Space Marines are just your average run of the mill genetically engineered super humans , there were no Primarchs and no God Emperor. Its all a fabrication based on 10,000 years of superstition and folklore and partly a purposeful method to control the masses.
> 
> All we know about Nid's and Necrons really are Imperial Reports about how bad they are and how widespread, when in fact they are a threat but not that bad. But a climate of fear is that much better to govern with.
> 
> Aramoro


Nid's just want to get petted and Necron's just want a hug?


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## Captain Stillios (Mar 8, 2009)

Necrons do just want hugs! 

HUGS FOR THE HUGS GOD!!!


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## Chompy Bits (Jun 13, 2010)

Ultramarines have a twentieth implant. After the black carapace is inserted every marine has a stick shoved up their rectum. This is done to ensure that the marine maintains the air of a whiny, uptight, pain in the ass.

Just kidding.

But seriously, Tzeentch is actually the Deceiver in disguise.


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## Angel of Blood (Aug 18, 2010)

I once heard Sanguinius was infact the main traitor of the Heresy and Horus went to Terra to try and protect the Emperor, Sanguinius tried to fight him off but got killed in an act of self defence by Horus, the Emperor then seeing Horus having ''murdered' his beloved son flew into a rage and attacked Horus who tried to protect himself, the Emperor then obliterated him and injured himself massively for the shits and giggles factor and so that he could spend the rest of his time being a complete slob sitting in a chair with a perfectly valid reason.

Sure its refrences somewhere, i cant find the exact source right now though.....


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## Mathai (Sep 1, 2010)

Heh heh, this is so far my favorite thread on this site!

Hmm, a good bats%*t crazy theory huh? Well I remember overhearing this discussion a couple times around the table, and thinking about it has made it seem to fit right in here. But my theory is that a Phoenix Lord would beat a Primarch every time. =) ( And I stand by my theory here!  Unless there is precedent in the many books I have yet to read, that is. At which point I know how to be a man and admit his faults...But untill then I am 100 positive that this is the case!! :so_happy: )


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## bane-of-banes (Sep 9, 2010)

ChaosJunkie said:


> I know someone who believes that the emperor was killed by Horus, so the man on the golden throne is actually Horus, and the CSMs are all the loyalists which is why they say death to the false emperor. I have no idea where he got it from


lmao, what the fuck.


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## meinhardt (Sep 22, 2008)

the ultra marines actually sided with horace. guillilman concocted the codex to weaken the loyalist legions so they could never strike back at the traitor legions en masse.

kinda strange now that ultramar is kind of its own little empire.


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

Mathai said:


> Hmm, a good bats%*t crazy theory huh? Well I remember overhearing this discussion a couple times around the table, and thinking about it has made it seem to fit right in here. But my theory is that a Phoenix Lord would beat a Primarch every time. =) ( And I stand by my theory here!  Unless there is precedent in the many books I have yet to read, that is. At which point I know how to be a man and admit his faults...But untill then I am 100 positive that this is the case!! :so_happy: )


Well, it only took a dreadnought to kill Karandras. (Path of the Warrior) I`m pretty sure Primarch rates above dreadnought, so...


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## Mathai (Sep 1, 2010)

Serpion5 said:


> Well, it only took a dreadnought to kill Karandras. (Path of the Warrior) I`m pretty sure Primarch rates above dreadnought, so...


 
Lies and Imperial slander I say! :biggrin: Heh heh, just kidding. Well, everything in the books does seem to be tilted towards space marines and perpetuating them as the most unstoppable force in the end every time...which is deffinitely quite odd....New theory! The Emperor of Mankind truly exists. He has forseen his own future and has gone to work for Games Workshop with the intent of spreading propoganda in the form of fiction and ensures he is viewed as unstoppable by presenting his beloved childeren the Space Marines as the pentultimate fighting force over even races vastly superior in every way like the Eldar.  But I am thanks for the book reference to where that came from. I love the books and fluff that involve other game races alot more than book created races and such.


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## Chompy Bits (Jun 13, 2010)

Mathai said:


> ... races vastly superior in every way like the Eldar.


Vastly superior? Please, the eldar are a bunch of arrogant has-beens. If it wasn't for all their leg humping when they got bored the galaxy would be in a much better state than it is now.

Crazy eldar theory: the eldar actually serve chaos and caused slaanesh's birth on purpose. This was done so that one of his/hers/its? daemonic servants could corrupt fulgrim and prevent him from stopping the horus heresy before it started. That, and the black library is actually an adult bookstore with a jacuzzi where the phoenix lords chill out and drink cocktails while reading dirty magazines.:crazy:


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## increaso (Jun 5, 2010)

Going to back to the old official forums i liked LL's theory that Malcador was the mastermind behind the great crusade and the Emperor was just a figurehead.

The craziest (teetering on plausible) theory is that the Emperor planned the entire heresy to elevate himself to godhood.


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## Bloody Mary (Nov 6, 2009)

The Chaos Gods want the Emperor to ascend to godhood. It was their plan all along.


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## Yog-Sothoth (Jan 8, 2010)

increaso said:


> Going to back to the old official forums i liked LL's theory that Malcador was the mastermind behind the great crusade and the Emperor was just a figurehead.


That is a really cool theory, where did you find it?


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## Mossy Toes (Jun 8, 2009)

Same guy as "The Shape of the Nightmare to Come." He posited that Malcador is the real gestalt of shamans and stuff, the true figure throughout history, and that the Emperor is little more than an extremely powerful proto-Primarch, a psychic puppet that he uses as a figurehead to bind the Great Crusade together.

Yeah, that one is definitely a good one.


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## increaso (Jun 5, 2010)

Yog-Sothoth said:


> That is a really cool theory, where did you find it?


It was on the last version of the official Black Library forum.

I'm not sure whether they still exist in some stagnant form or not.

The theory was well thought out and fit well with what we knew at the time that it was posted (around about the time Legion came out if i recall correctly).


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## Malgron (Jan 6, 2010)

Hmm I never thought about it like that. 

One of the questions from the heresy books is what do the space marines do when the crusade is over? When they have united humanity and cleansed the galaxy, what would their purpose be?

If Malcador is some kind of master of puppets, he probably thought to himself "okay the crusade is finishing up, how to I get rid of these super-humans whose only purpose is to fight?.... Turn half of them against the other half!" You would think he would have known Chaos would have crept into the mix.

Personally, I think the Emp struck a bargain with the Chaos gods when creating his Sons. Probably something along the lines of "we will help you create 20 sons, 4 of which shall be ours(1 each)" Not knowing which of the 20 would be taken, the Emp scatters them onto planets with human populations, believing once he found them again, he would be able to determine if corruption had taken hold. Leman Russ and Sanguinus (possibly Lion) seem to be ones that the Gods chose, but due to the Emp interfering, the Gods found new Primarchs

I have a crazy theory that Huron is a failed Horus clone, possibly inserted by the alpha legion onto whatever planet the astral claws recruited from. Alpha Legion could have planted many of it's hypno-subjects onto local recruitment planets, which is why some the space marines of loyal legions turn to his side when he attacks.

Say Fabius Bile had a clone he hid. He couldn't reproduce the sheer power of Horus in one individual, but maybe he could reproduce his tactical genius. Perhaps the Hamadrya plays some roll in "completing" Huron as some kind of manifestation of Horus's psyche. It sure is ugly.


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## Brother Subtle (May 24, 2009)

ckcrawford said:


> One that was created by _Angels of Darkness_ is that perhaps the fallen are actually loyalist DA and that Lion El' Johnson could have been on Horus' side if Horus had been able to wait for the DA's to arrive on Terra.
> 
> I like this Heresy


This one may not be so crazy after all :grin:


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## beast187 (Sep 6, 2009)

I heard that Wal-Mart owns GW, and the Warhammer 40k game is Wal-Mart's blueprints for ultimate domination of the galaxy. They allow us gamers to play out thier battles for them so they have everything figured out when Wal-Mart decides to make their Chinese Primarchs.

Hmmmm.....


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## The Boz (Aug 16, 2010)

Ethereals are all Callidus assassins. There. Discuss.


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

The Boz said:


> Ethereals are all Callidus assassins. There. Discuss.


Well, as batshit crazy theories go, this is a good one. It would make sense that the Imperium would exploit the tau`s loyalty in this way. If they had half the brain needed to figure it out...

Excellent work Boz, you have opened up a whole new line of possibilities. Imperial manipulated Tau... :biggrin:


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## SnoopyChicken (Sep 23, 2010)

I used to have a theory that the emperor was one of the lost primarchs, sent through time instead of space. It could even go some way to explaining why their records were deleted.

The emperor realised that HE was one of the lost primarchs and that his life to this point was predestined by chaos and likely all part of the grand schemers plans. Desperate that no-one should find this out(and not knowing which primarch he was) he ordered the destruction of the two still lost primarchs records and dissolved their legions.

That was before I really got into the fluff and realised it wasnt possible, but I still love it for its complexity without any evidence!


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## gothik (May 29, 2010)

increaso said:


> It was on the last version of the official Black Library forum.
> 
> I'm not sure whether they still exist in some stagnant form or not.
> 
> The theory was well thought out and fit well with what we knew at the time that it was posted (around about the time Legion came out if i recall correctly).


i remember that one, i thought it was excellent (i was justice there) i really enjoyed that thread


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## Androxine Vortex (Jan 20, 2010)

locustgate said:


> I wonder how many of these conspiracy nuts watch glenn beck


I agree that he does go a little fanatical but he does have good points.

A friend of mine tried explaining to me that the warp was reality and what happens here is just the reflection. Its not crazy, in fact it sounds interesting, but its just not true.


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## Master_Marius (Sep 5, 2010)

Brother Subtle said:


> Quote:
> Originally Posted by *ckcrawford*
> _One that was created by Angels of Darkness is that perhaps the fallen are actually loyalist DA and that Lion El' Johnson could have been on Horus' side if Horus had been able to wait for the DA's to arrive on Terra.
> 
> ...


I really hope is not like this. I hope they don't fuck more Dark Angels...


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## gothik (May 29, 2010)

craziest one i heard was about 15 years ago when someone told me that they believed that the WHF world was the past version of the WH40 world, that sigmar was a primarch and something happened to turn WHF into WH40...the eldar were future elves etc etc didn't believe them then and soooo glad for that one. crazy theory but i guess there are some die hard theorists who still truely believe that crock of WHF being the past of WH40 maybe....possibly.....not


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## Chompy Bits (Jun 13, 2010)

gothik said:


> the eldar were future elves


Elves = Hardcore Exodites? Just kidding, I know this theory is BS.


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## gothik (May 29, 2010)

my best mate said as much chompy at the time although i can see why they said eldar=elves


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## Chompy Bits (Jun 13, 2010)

There's also another major problem with that theory. If WHF is the past of WH40k then how the hell could Sigmar be a primarch before the Emperor ever created them?

UNLESS... THE EMPEROR IS ACTUALLY SIGMAR. MWUHAHAHAHA:wacko:
Man, I really need some sleep.


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## gothik (May 29, 2010)

Chompy Bits said:


> There's also another major problem with that theory. If WHF is the past of WH40k then how the hell could Sigmar be a primarch before the Emperor ever created them?
> 
> UNLESS... THE EMPEROR IS ACTUALLY SIGMAR. MWUHAHAHAHA:wacko:
> Man, I really need some sleep.


lol yeah guess you dok:


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## locustgate (Dec 6, 2009)

Androxine Vortex said:


> I agree that he does go a little fanatical but he does have good points.
> 
> A friend of mine tried explaining to me that the warp was reality and what happens here is just the reflection. Its not crazy, in fact it sounds interesting, but its just not true.


Man.....I poster that ages ago.


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## CJay (Aug 25, 2010)

Tyranids were actually pets of the Orks. Nah, jk. it was a joke me and some DoW2 buddies shared after seeing a model picture of a looted carnifex. If no one knows what Im talkin about here's the link.

http://www.heresy-online.net/forums/newreply.php?do=newreply&noquote=1&p=766311


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## Bloody Mary (Nov 6, 2009)

Some of the Primarchs went over to Chaos, because the Emperor ordered them to. The Emperor wanted to get rid of Chaos and to do that he'd probably need agents on the inside.

Horus was the most unlikely to betray the Emperor, so clearly he must have been ordered by the Emperor to join Chaos when given the opportunity. 

Magnus, being a really powerful psyker, was prime bait for Tzeentch. The whole raising of Prospero was arranged between Emps and Magnus, so that Tzeentch would take him in.

Night Haunter was not meant to be let on on the secret, but he had a vision and so the Emperor had to explain things to him.

Several other Primarchs had been groomed as bait for the Chaos Gods, hence why Emps acted like he did towards Angron, Mortarion, etc.

Am I doin it rite, guise?


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## Unknown Primarch (Feb 25, 2008)

i like this theory and for whatever anyone else says it could make sense even if it wasnt a direct order of the emperor. could the emperor have studied say the orks DNA to see how imprinted memories work and formulated certain primarchs to be prone to rebellion and certain primarchs to be unquestioningly loyal when prompted in some way by certain stimuli. by having certain genecodes set for certain tasks he could have a vast method of control over beings who would be linked to the essence of chaos and be able to use it in some way to combat the fell powers of the chaos gods.

the title said batshit theories, hows that one?!


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## Baron Spikey (Mar 26, 2008)

Flying Fox sized shit...


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## Brother Arnold (Aug 29, 2010)

This theory is a WHF=WH40 type thing...
OK, so Sigmar is one of the lost Primarchs. The Warhammer world (Which we shall call Hephaestus) was considered to have way too much Chaos going around for the Emperor to safely set foot on, so Sigmar remained lost but since the Emperor just went, "Oh no, I'm pretty sure there were 20", the lost part is still listed. The Old Ones never came back, due to their having been annihilated by the Necrons. All the Elves are just really hardcore Exodites (Some of them went different ways, hence the 3 types of Elf) and the Dwarves are exiled Squats who survived the Nids due to not being with the other Squats. Just before the world was declared Exterminatus, the Maelstrom came up around it and it somehow got into an area of the Warp that looked sort of like Terran atmosphere.
I also came up with this really crazy theory several months ago that pretty much had the point that the Tau are actually Old Ones. I forget most of it, but the Ethereals and the massive leaps in technology came in there. There was also the Ethereals saying "NO WARP TRAVEL 4 U" as part of the evidence.


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## KingOfCheese (Jan 4, 2010)

beast187 said:


> I heard that Wal-Mart owns GW, and the Warhammer 40k game is Wal-Mart's blueprints for ultimate domination of the galaxy. They allow us gamers to play out thier battles for them so they have everything figured out when Wal-Mart decides to make their Chinese Primarchs.


There is no way that Wal-Mart and GW are the same company.

The idea of Wal-Mart is to make things affordable.
GW on the other hand...... well...... icknose:


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## Baron Spikey (Mar 26, 2008)

KingOfCheese said:


> There is no way that Wal-Mart and GW are the same company.
> 
> The idea of Wal-Mart is to make things affordable.
> GW on the other hand...... well...... icknose:


And that's why it works, they seem to have 2 completely different business plans. But what they're really doing is swinging round to attack from both sides, economical flanking movement :read:


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## Brother Arnold (Aug 29, 2010)

Baron Spikey said:


> And that's why it works, they seem to have 2 completely different business plans. But what they're really doing is swinging round to attack from both sides, economical flanking movement :read:


You mean... +1 COMBAT RESOLUTION?!?!:shok:


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## Chompy Bits (Jun 13, 2010)

The Emperor was bald. Those long locks of hair he had was actually a wig.


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## IntereoVivo (Jul 14, 2009)

The "Chaos gods" are misunderstood. They are painted black by the =][= who engineered the Horus Heresy in order to put the Emperor under their control. Now that they have him in the Golden Throne (which locks his mind in a Mobius Strip to keep him from breaking free and suspends his healing ability) they are feeding him Psykers (black ships) in order to try and create a new god that they can control. Only a few of the highest members of the =][= know what is going on and they are working with Guilliman (who is still alive) to control the Space Marines. The true loyalists (Chaos Space Marines) are fighting to free the Emperor from his unnatural bondage to the =][= and the "Choas gods" are helping them out because they want to help save the Emperor since they used to be friends.

The Emperor's Psychic abilites have grown so close to those of a god that he created the Tyranid and, as the Hive Mind, is trying desperately to invade his own Galaxy in order to free himself.


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

Leman Russ did not vanish into the Eye of Terror. 

He just got sick of drinking and fighting, and now he live in a church somewhere on Calth.

Also, the necrons were supposed to wake up 10 000 years ago. But their alarm clocks failed...


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## SnoopyChicken (Sep 23, 2010)

Serpion5 said:


> Also, the necrons were supposed to wake up 10 000 years ago. But their alarm clocks failed...


Close, but it was actually the void dragon hitting snooze.


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## Bloody Mary (Nov 6, 2009)

I was re-reading the Night Haunter is secretly alive thread and I realized a profound truth. You see, since all BL books are apparently written from the perspective of imperial documentation, it clearly means that there's at least one imperial scholar disguised as somebody else in all the books from non-imperial perspective.


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## zerachiel76 (Feb 12, 2010)

There are several Daemon Prince of Tzeentch who regularly post on this forum

*looks at Child of the Emperor and Baron Spikey for starters


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## Serpion5 (Mar 19, 2010)

zerachiel76 said:


> There are several Daemon Prince of Tzeentch who regularly post on this forum
> 
> *looks at Child of the Emperor and Baron Spikey for starters


Unlikely. For one, Baron lacks the wit to be a true servant of Tzeentch, And CotE has not the vision to be fully embraced by the Change God. 

They may well be servants of change, but they have not reached daemonhood yet.

A more likely candidate in my view is Darkreever. Oh, the tales he weaves, and he will tolerate no challenger. Much more Tzeentchian than these other two if you ask me. 

@Baron and CotE: But I still have an eye on each of you... :spiteful:


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## Phoebus (Apr 17, 2010)

Those familiar with the Changer of Ways know that he is the most cunning of the Powers that influence the Galaxy.

As with the rest of the Chaos deities, Tzeentch greatle envied the Emperor's children--the Primarchs. Magnus especially must have been his target from day one, given his immense psychic abilities. How to win him over, though? Tzeentch simply could not influence a being possessing Magnus' power directly--not outside the Immaterium. And Magnus countered the mutations Tzeentch inflicted on his Sons; it cost him an eye the first time, but he knew how to defeat such an attack now... unless he could be distracted somehow.

So, cunning Tzeentch hatched a scheme within the greater scheme his brethren were orchestrating. Knowing that Magnus would never betray his father and could not be coerced to do so by the means the other Primarchs were, Tzeentch turned to other targets.

The Changer of Ways corrupted the blunt, barbaric, and decidedly non-cerebral Leman Russ. He warped his being as surely as he did the Gene-seed his Space Wolves depended on. Amazingly, no one identified Tzeentch's influence as a source for the all-too obvious lycanthropic mutations the sons of Fenris suffered from. He twisted their minds as surely as he twisted their bodies, making remarkable hypocrites of them: they frothed, raged, and hurled their offal when around sorcerers like the Thousand Sons, even as they jealously guarded and zealously preserved the petty tricks of rune-carving and bone-casting Tzeentch bestowed upon them.

It was easy, thus, to use a lesser pawn--the Space Wolves and Russ--in order to gain the greater piece: the Thousand Sons and Magnus. Having Horus change Russ' orders from a simple capture to a genocide was easy enough, especially given Russ' masochistic and/or blind willingness to happily embark on actions that would obviously lead to great disaster for his father's Imperium.

Having to focus his energies and powers to defeat another Primarch handily distracted Magnus, enabling Tzeentch to back-door his changing ways into Prospero, which led to the Thousand Sons re-mutating at the most crucial juncture. Abandoned by the Imperium, faced with the spectre of losing all his Sons... Magnus finally had to accept Tzeentch.

Best of all, Tzeentch maintains the best sleeper agents within the Imperium. He manipulated his childishly maverick pawns into throwing a tantrum over the re-structuring of the Codex Astartes, which forced Rogal Dorn to also take a stance of independence, for no other reason than pride--how could he bow down when the least useful Primarch in the Imperium wouldn't? This of course led to the Imperial Fists being decimated in the Iron Cage incident... only ONE example of Tzeentch's use of the Space Wolves to de-stabilize his enemies for his own amusement.

Despite their obvious touch of Chaos, Space Wolves remain greatly respected to this day--Logan Grimnar is even counted as one of the most beloved heroes of Man!

Note: the above was of course delivered with a heavy dose of sarcasm! :grin:


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