# Totally FALSE (And Hopefully Amusing) 40k Rumors



## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

And now for something completely different... I'd like you folks to come up with some wild and crazy GW/40k rumors that will NEVER EVER be done by GW. This is just an exercise in humor and imagination...

Let me start it off...

"GW will release a line of chips and drinks to be sold in all GW Outlets. Any OTHER shop selling non-GW snacks and munchies within a 3mile/KM radius will be issued with a "cease and desist" notice by GW legal for "Gamer Refreshment Infringement"..." :security:


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## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

GW are releasing Citadel Water, its a new kind of water for cleaning your brushes, which have been redesigned to fall apart on contact with non GW water. Citadel water comes in a handy 2ml pot for the highly competitive price of just £17.99.


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## effigy22 (Jun 29, 2008)

If you buy an entire chapter of ultramarines from GW direct they will also post you Matt Ward who will, when unpackaged, tie you down and force you to rim him.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Space Marines will be getting a new Flyer that can turn into a Monstrous Jump Infantry Unit at the start of your movement phase. It'll be an BS4, AV13/13/13 5HP with a 3++ that turns into a WS4, BS4, T9, W9, I10,LD10, SV2+/3++ with Vector Dance, Skyfire, Fearless and comes equipped with the new 2 Rotary Lascannons. It fires 10 twin-linked shots each as S9, AP1 with a range of 72". It'll cost 145 points and can repair lost HP/Wounds on a roll of a 3+. It'll come only in Ultramarine Blue and Gold.

Here's the design art:


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## Xabre (Dec 20, 2006)

Black Templars will be getting a new codex.


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## spanner94ezekiel (Jan 6, 2011)

Well someone's gotta say it...




Squats.


:secret:


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## scscofield (May 23, 2011)

SoB are having all Faith mechanics replaced with a new mechanic called 'Rage of the Red Tide'

They are also having their models replaced with Squat models in white wigs. 

They will only be in play until the Nid codex update, where they will be eaten and removed from the system.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

scscofield said:


> SoB are having all Faith mechanics replaced with a new mechanic called 'Rage of the Red Tide'
> 
> They are also having their models replaced with Squat models in white wigs.
> 
> They will only be in play until the Nid codex update, where they will be eaten and removed from the system.


Are they judge's wigs?


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## Teedyrj (Jun 1, 2013)

With the release if 7th ed this summer GW will more the time line on to 50k

•sister of battle have fallen to chaos
•the eldar are all dead 
•mechanicum have hacked the necrons there now total benign and most people have there own undead robot servant
•the adaptus tera has fallen to be replaced by the health and safety executive, all tank must now be labeled "warning may contain explosives" and the guard have band loh stick, commissar now routinely execute people for running in a combat zone
•the custods finally finger out that the golden throne hasn't been plugged in this hole time, quickly fix the problem and by tea time the Emperor is up and about agin, but dose complain of a dry throat


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Teedyrj said:


> With the release if 7th ed this summer GW will more the time line on to 50k
> 
> •sister of battle have fallen to chaos
> •the eldar are all dead
> ...


Oh! I could do my Daughters of Khorne army finally!


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## Teedyrj (Jun 1, 2013)

Well you've got to now


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## scscofield (May 23, 2011)

This wig, and most of them are crooked on the model.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Teedyrj said:


> Well you've got to now


Not a problem really. I've got the eventual plan of doing two Sisters armies, one loyalist and one fallen to Khorne and depending on what I'm playing against determines which I field. Now I only have to make one! 




scscofield said:


> This wig, and most of them are crooked on the model.


Yeah, a judge's wig would have been more entertaining I think.


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## Chaosftw (Oct 20, 2008)

GW will lower their prices


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## Archon Dan (Feb 6, 2012)

Zion said:


> Oh! I could do my Daughters of Khorne army finally!


I would love to see Heretical SoBs. It'll be like when your party's Paladin goes Black Guard.



Chaosftw said:


> GW will lower their prices


Does releasing the Bike, Destroyer and War Walker bundles count?



After using 6ed to balance all the armies, GW will release 7ed. The new edition will re-write all USRs so that nothing is balanced.


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## revilo44 (Sep 17, 2010)

GW making a race of space animals that work for inquisitors.


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

GW will release a line of full-sized Ultramarine power and terminator armor for cosplay use... unfortuneatly, it's Finecast...


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Archon Dan said:


> I would love to see Heretical SoBs. It'll be like when your party's Paladin goes Black Guard.


Yes, that moment where everyone needs to go put on their brown pants. :so_happy:

GW is now moving into selling baking goods. Their first product will be a set a set of pans that allow you to make a cake sprue that you can then cut up and assemble into a Space Marine. Currently it only comes as an Ultramarine. Blue Food colouring will be sold separately in .75ml containers for $20. It's said that you'll have to send GW money every time you use it to be allowed to use the cake mold.

GW is also moving into the exciting world of hygiene products with their line of Chaos God products: currently for sale are Slaanesh Tampons, Tzeentch Diapers (now with 46% extra straps, extra legholes for when your kid spontaneous mutates and they're always on fire), Nurgle Soap, and Khorne is being used for a line of ultra-sharp razors that are guaranteed to get you a shave so close that all that will be left is your screaming skull.


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## khrone forever (Dec 13, 2010)

GW will fully support all retail stores who sell their products
GW will fully support all specialist games


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## Kettu (Nov 20, 2007)

How did everyone miss this one?
All new Sisters of Battle Codex and full range of Plastic and Fine Cast Miniatures coming before 7th ed.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Kettu said:


> How did everyone miss this one?
> All new Sisters of Battle Codex and full range of Plastic and Fine Cast Miniatures coming before 7th ed.


But that's one I actually believe. :cray:


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## Teedyrj (Jun 1, 2013)

I don't care about the new SOB codex to much as long as mistress get there lash of submission, I recon that how they feel
To chaos I the first place


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## Kettu (Nov 20, 2007)

Zion said:


> But that's one I actually believe. :cray:


There, there. I hope it's true myself but I gave up any sense of optimism years ago.


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## baron_sathonyx (Jun 19, 2011)

We at GW are 100% getting rid of finecast but not only that there killing all people who thought it was a good idea on the day of that board meeting and we are getting rid of matt ward, but wait theres more are prices are going to drop be 30% and all armies that do not have a hardback codex are getting an update for both 40k and fantasy along with(but not including) an army book for each sub faction with in each race.


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## Hellados (Sep 16, 2009)

baron_sathonyx said:


> We at GW are 100% getting rid of finecast but not only that there killing all people who thought it was a good idea on the day of that board meeting and we are getting rid of matt ward, but wait theres more are prices are going to drop be 30% and all armies that do not have a hardback codex are getting an update for both 40k and fantasy along with(but not including) an army book for each sub faction with in each race.


This is an easy one, you see they're on the stock market, well scrap this and buy, blackmail, cheat and steal all the shares back. On a more realistic note they have to save up loads then make the price drop so they can buy them all back.


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

GW is going to open a series of "Cadian Whiteshield" summer camps, where, for a low 2-month cost of 5 000$, you can send your children to be trained as the expendable meatshields of the Emperor. They'll have a chance to battle the elements, and each other, to death, while learning to field-strip flashlights and go on 50-mile death marches. And you'll LOVE our trained councillors, but we call them Commissars...


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## baron_sathonyx (Jun 19, 2011)

Hellados said:


> This is an easy one, you see they're on the stock market, well scrap this and buy, blackmail, cheat and steal all the shares back. On a more realistic note they have to save up loads then make the price drop so they can buy them all back.


i know its obvious, if anything its my wishlist that will never come true mainly because GW just keep finding ways to lose large amounts of money very quickly.


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## Hellados (Sep 16, 2009)

Yeah, I have no idea who's running it....

My wish list has always been more representation for the 'sub units' like the Admech, SoB, even the PDF, there are loads for all the races, although with the allies this is a bit easier


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## Archon Dan (Feb 6, 2012)

Zion said:


> GW is also moving into the exciting world of hygiene products with their line of Chaos God products: currently for sale are Slaanesh Tampons, Tzeentch Diapers (now with 46% extra straps, extra legholes for when your kid spontaneous mutates and they're always on fire), Nurgle Soap, and Khorne is being used for a line of ultra-sharp razors that are guaranteed to get you a shave so close that all that will be left is your screaming skull.


Interesting. I would think Nurgle would prefer re-usable tissues. And is Slaanesh's product barbed?



Zion said:


> But that's one I actually believe. :cray:


Sadly, your beliefs are irrelevant to GW. I want SoB updated for the flavor of their army. Plus, Slaanesh has to sell that product to somebody. 



Kettu said:


> There, there. I hope it's true myself but I gave up any sense of optimism years ago.


You're playing into GWs hand you know. 



Deneris said:


> GW is going to open a series of "Cadian Whiteshield" summer camps, where, for a low 2-month cost of 5 000$, you can send your children to be trained as the expendable meatshields of the Emperor. They'll have a chance to battle the elements, and each other, to death, while learning to field-strip flashlights and go on 50-mile death marches. And you'll LOVE our trained councillors, but we call them Commissars...


Is it really only for children? I know a few adults that could benefit from this. Or is it that I would benefit from them attending ...?


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## Ddraig Cymry (Dec 30, 2012)

After much forethought, Games Workshop is going to replace its most popular and frequently purchased Finecast models with ones made from white metal again! Games Workshop believes it will help players feel more connected to the older editions of 40k, and will be subject to price increases, including $25 for a small model.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

Archon Dan said:


> Interesting. I would think Nurgle would prefer re-usable tissues. And is Slaanesh's product barbed?


Nurgle Soap is the only soap that will give you a new disease everytime you use it! It's perfect for getting out of work, avoiding responsibility and generally lying about in a state of perpetual misery.

Slaanesh's tampons are only barbed with the finest silver barbed wire money can buy.


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## normtheunsavoury (Mar 20, 2008)

Just received this email from GW HQ



> For quite some time now many people have been saying we don't listen to our fans and loyal customers, we can assure each and every one of you that this simply could not be further from the truth, we hold your opinions in the highest regard and as a result of your views we are releasing a brand new product.
> 
> Matt Ward tissues!
> 
> ...


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## GrimzagGorwazza (Aug 5, 2010)

Games workshop have decided that they have pushed the envelope as far as they can and are looking to sell all of their intelectual proporties. Current interested parties include wizzkids who are looking at streamlining the system and making it more child friendly by introducing prepainted, rubberised miniatures to replace the current ranges.


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

I heard it was Disney, actually... and Calgar is getting a new Mouse-helmet mold...


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## Archon Dan (Feb 6, 2012)

GrimzagGorwazza said:


> Games workshop have decided that they have pushed the envelope as far as they can and are looking to sell all of their intelectual proporties. Current interested parties include wizzkids who are looking at streamlining the system and making it more child friendly by introducing prepainted, rubberised miniatures to replace the current ranges.


Hey! If it weren't for Mageknight, I wouldn't be playing 40K now. Gotta start somewhere. Still wish Wizkids hadn't let that game tank.


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## Da Joka (Feb 20, 2009)

Now Canon Fluff! New Model coming later this year!


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## MidnightSun (Feb 10, 2009)

GW are cutting down on the number of MEQ codices.
GW are dropping the lawsuit against Chapterhouse
Price drop.

Midnight


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

GW is going to work with NERF and release a line of NERF boltweapons and close combat weapons...


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## Kettu (Nov 20, 2007)

Archon Dan said:


> You're playing into GWs hand you know.


Not really, for close to a year the only things I've been buying from GW is the Battle Magic Cards for each faction as they come out.

Until Sisters, Wood Elves or Bretonnia (maybe) are updated it's unlikely they'll much more then $8 Aus a quarter year from me.

Hell, even when they come out I'm still not buying till I decide if it's even worth the effort anymore. 
For almost all intents and purpose GW has lost me as a customer.


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## GrimzagGorwazza (Aug 5, 2010)

Archon Dan said:


> Hey! If it weren't for Mageknight, I wouldn't be playing 40K now. Gotta start somewhere. Still wish Wizkids hadn't let that game tank.



Funnily enough i wasn't even aware mageknight existed when i typed up my rumour. I was actually trying to reference the series of events which led to the destruction of Rackham Miniatures. 

Miniature released by Rackham between 1997-2008









Rackham is purchased and becomes Rackham entertainment
Miniatures produced 2008-2010










Rackham goes into liquidation in 2010


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## Kettu (Nov 20, 2007)

At risk of further derailment, anyone know where I could get one of these glorious miniatures? (See Bottom) They scrapped it from their site literally a week before I intended to buy it and haven't had any luck finding it since.

Meanwhile, back onto topic...

After the success of the Daemons cross-release, GW is planning on making lightning strike twice with another planned cross release.
As the Brettonian forces have been sorely needing an update and Space Marines are sorely lacking Cavalry options, Brettonia is going to be reconned into Knights in Shining _Power_ Armour.
Bolters aren't going to reappear in Fantasy so the new sprues will include several various Close Combat Weapons as well as extra pieces to represent stolen Empire Mechanical Horses.
Heraldry won't go away but now rather then wear Tabards they paint their Houses, which are now called Chapters, insignia straight onto their armour itself.

The Damsels themselves will be dropped as it's well known that women can't wear Power Armour but players won't notice this loss with the addition of Librarians, keepers of the lost Magical Tomes of Roboute. Whom Tigurius, the Greatest of the Librarians, liberated from the Coven of foul Wych-Fyre born Damsels led by the foul Greater Daemon of Slaanesh, Lay'di of the Laa'kh.

(I made myself sad writing that :alcoholic


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## SonofVulkan (Apr 14, 2010)

Remember that Imperial Fist Terminator cos-play from last month?

That was actually a preview of the new Space Marine Mega-Knight that is being released with the apocalypse update...


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

SonofVulkan said:


> Remember that Imperial Fist Terminator cos-play from last month?
> 
> That was actually a preview of the new Space Marine Mega-Knight that is being released with the apocalypse update...


Seems legit.


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## Nero Genesis (May 28, 2013)

The Tyranids and Necrons will ally themselves with the Tau in order to combat an even greater threat.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

The British Military has contracting Games Workshop to create the next generation of warfighting technology. It'll be made from high quality plastic and cast on large sprues. Games Workshop is providing specially designed sprue cutters, glue and a hobby knife for the mould lines. These warfighting kits that they are provided will be "infinitely customizable" and "repaintable for any terrain or conditions". 

Paints will be sold to the British Military seperately in small .75mL containers for only 3 quid a jar. The brushes will be provided, but the Military is already looking into outsourcing the brushes due to the poor quality of the GW brushes, and that the bristles keep falling out.

British Soldiers will begin training in the assemble, care and maintenance of their new equipment as well as the proper way to paint it so the brush strokes don't show. There is also a new manual being written on the various authorized conversions that will be permitted for the user to make. Unauthorized conversions will result in the Soldier being required to pay for a replacement.

The new kits will cost $9,000 quid each and will begin shipping at the start of 2014. 

Games Workshop has also recently amended their company motto to "Makers of the Finest Military Equipment in the World".


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

Zion said:


> The British Military has contracting Games Workshop to create the next generation of warfighting technology. It'll be made from high quality plastic and cast on large sprues. Games Workshop is providing specially designed sprue cutters, glue and a hobby knife for the mould lines. These warfighting kits that they are provided will be "infinitely customizable" and "repaintable for any terrain or conditions".
> 
> Paints will be sold to the British Military seperately in small .75mL containers for only 3 quid a jar. The brushes will be provided, but the Military is already looking into outsourcing the brushes due to the poor quality of the GW brushes, and that the bristles keep falling out.
> 
> ...


Seems legit.

Couldn't be any worse than some of the previous kit knocking about......


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

GW has bought a small island in the Caribbean, and plans to open a 5-star gamers only resort with 'Eavy Metal painters on staff to help with painting tips, hot and cold running rules lawyers, acres of Realms of Battle gaming boards, and a "Lustria-themed" Bugman's for all of your refreshment requirements...


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## spanner94ezekiel (Jan 6, 2011)

Not to mention the Daemonette waitresses/massueses...


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## Battman (Nov 2, 2012)

A NEW RACE.... That is not imperial or chaos go xenos.

Also great idea for thread this is funny


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## Moonschwine (Jun 13, 2011)

GW will be implementing a price drop across it's 40k range of 20% in the coming 6 months with pans to match future price adjustments in accordance to inflation rather than some bull shit number scape-goated by "rising costs".


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

With the advances in chip technology, GW will now imbed tiny tracking chips in every bit on a sprue, so as to ensure bitz are properly used and not stockpiled for resale. If bitz are detected together in large numbers, a signal will be sent to the chip causing the resin or plastic bit to explode violently...


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## TheReverend (Dec 2, 2007)

Man, I'm hoping that GW will release a line in baby accesories for my new son, including a mini Space Marine suit, scale model Imperator Titan which he could wear to animate on the table top or life-sized dwarf/squat costume I can suit him up in


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## Calamari (Feb 13, 2009)

revilo44 said:


> GW making a race of space animals that work for inquisitors.


They already did that one.



Deneris said:


> GW is going to work with NERF and release a line of NERF boltweapons and close combat weapons...


This I actually want to see!

GW are including a story where Khorne adopts a tiger cub and learns the true meaning of Christmas.

GW are going to start participating in forums to stay in touch with customers.


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## ntaw (Jul 20, 2012)

I heard that GW was going to allow 100% non GW models to be used during in store games.


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## Iron Angel (Aug 2, 2009)

Nero Genesis said:


> The Tyranids and Necrons will ally themselves with the Tau in order to combat an even greater threat.


I thought this was things GW _wouldn't_ do?


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## jaysen (Jul 7, 2011)

Deneris said:


> And now for something completely different... I'd like you folks to come up with some wild and crazy GW/40k rumors that will NEVER EVER be done by GW. This is just an exercise in humor and imagination...
> 
> Let me start it off...
> 
> "GW will release a line of chips and drinks to be sold in all GW Outlets. Any OTHER shop selling non-GW snacks and munchies within a 3mile/KM radius will be issued with a "cease and desist" notice by GW legal for "Gamer Refreshment Infringement"..." :security:


I'd love to see some Imperial versions of coffee and cigarettes, yummy.


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## jaysen (Jul 7, 2011)

Zion said:


> Space Marines will be getting a new Flyer that can turn into a Monstrous Jump Infantry Unit at the start of your movement phase. It'll be an BS4, AV13/13/13 5HP with a 3++ that turns into a WS4, BS4, T9, W9, I10,LD10, SV2+/3++ with Vector Dance, Skyfire, Fearless and comes equipped with the new 2 Rotary Lascannons. It fires 10 twin-linked shots each as S9, AP1 with a range of 72". It'll cost 145 points and can repair lost HP/Wounds on a roll of a 3+. It'll come only in Ultramarine Blue and Gold.
> 
> Here's the design art:


And the model is just $150!


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## jaysen (Jul 7, 2011)

GW will just rebundle old SM models and charge 20% more for them. Oh wait, they already did.


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## DeathJester921 (Feb 15, 2009)

GW will release an army of traitor female space marines with the label "Tzeentch made, Slaanesh approved"


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## Fiddlestix (Mar 21, 2013)

GW is going to ask Count's Kustoms to build them a lifesized working Predator tank.
The Emperor of Man will get his lazy ass off that throne and get a job.
A small sect of Orks will find out their love for each other is greater than their love for battle and form Clan Fabulous.
Squig on a stick will become the official snack food of Warhammer 40k.
An adults only Black Library novel will be published featuring an inter species orgy between Eldar and Space Marines.
Kharn the Betrayer will find his lost kitten and learn to love again.


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

Fiddlestix said:


> Kharn the Betrayer will find his lost kitten and learn to love again.


I want to call you a damn liar. But for some reason this seems quite plausible.......


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## Fiddlestix (Mar 21, 2013)

Tawa said:


> I want to call you a damn liar. But for some reason this seems quite plausible.......


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

GW buys Heresy Online, and replaces Jez with Matt Ward. Civil war ensues as Wardians and Jezian loyalist mods battle it out...


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## Silens (Dec 26, 2010)

Deneris said:


> GW buys Heresy Online, and replaces Jez with Matt Ward. Civil war ensues as Wardians and Jezian loyalist mods battle it out...


So it'd just be Matt Ward vs the mods?


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## Jacobite (Jan 26, 2007)

GW has started the process of sueing the creators of Pacific Rim for IP Infringement. They claim that making a film about giant robots battling creatures from another dimension is too close their titans and people might get confused.


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## The 13th (Jul 7, 2013)

In January 14 an epic new expansion will be released allowing for 

WH vs,. WH40K Battles. 

This is also times with the release of the new crossover Panda Army army


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## The 13th (Jul 7, 2013)

"Pack up and go home. "

That wad the words that echoed through the 40k Universe last night when Mum told all the armies to stop being so childish and to try getting a long. 

An anonymous source from each army was quoted to have said

" but Muuuuuhm, they're mean to us"


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

The 13th said:


> "Pack up and go home. "
> 
> That wad the words that echoed through the 40k Universe last night when Mum told all the armies to stop being so childish and to try getting a long.
> 
> ...


"And that includes you, Timmy Tyranid! I know your mother! Now get back to your own galaxy to play!"


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## Fiddlestix (Mar 21, 2013)

Blizzard Entertainment will publicly admit that their top franchises are complete ripoffs of Warhammer.
A Warhammer 40k video game will be made, and will probably suck.
A celebrity tournament will be held.
Games Workshop will partner with Kellogg's to make a cereal called Dakka Puffs, then they will make another cereal with Marshmallows called Dakka Puffs n' Bitz.
A new army loosely based on Mad Max: Roadwarrior will be made.....which would be awesome.


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## Dave T Hobbit (Dec 3, 2009)

GW will turn over production solely to making 3D representations of John Blanche artwork from the late 80s. People will hail this as a step forward.


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

CS Goto will be brought in to write the army fluff for every codex. Every army will have access to multi-lasers because of this.


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

Zion said:


> CS Goto will be brought in to write the army fluff for every codex. Every army will have access to multi-lasers because of this.


...And, of course, terminators will now gain a "back-flip" save, in addition to all of their other saves.


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## High_Seraph (Aug 28, 2009)

Razorbacks will gain the special rule to transform once per game into Land Raiders as well.


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

High_Seraph said:


> Razorbacks will gain the special rule to transform once per game into Land Raiders as well.


No no no... you've got the rumor wrong. Razorbacks CAN transform, but into Dreadknights. Storm Pigeons will also gain this ability.

"Razorbactobots, roll out!"


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## The 13th (Jul 7, 2013)

The Emperor returns in tomorrow's latest release! 
He's the one man army everyone always wanted, with the new invincibility rule giving him I. Muuuuuhm it to your petty weapons. 
Unfortunately he just tripped over a rock and broke his back, rendering him unplayable


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## The 13th (Jul 7, 2013)

The Emperor returns in tomorrow's latest release! 
He's the one man army everyone always wanted, with the new invincibility rule giving him I. Muuuuuhm it to your petty weapons. 
Unfortunately he just tripped over a rock and broke his back, rendering him unplayable


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## Jezlad (Oct 14, 2006)

Just in! 

GW are playtesting scratch and sniff battlefield effects due for release alongside the sexually reimagined sisters of battle.


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

Zion said:


> CS Goto will be brought in to write the army fluff for every codex. Every army will have access to multi-lasers because of this.


I just threw up a little in my mouth..... uke:



Jezlad said:


> Just in!
> 
> GW are playtesting scratch and sniff battlefield effects due for release alongside the sexually reimagined sisters of battle.


Don't play with my hopes and dreams like that! :shok:


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## Apostle (Jun 29, 2012)

The most depressing thing is that so many authors picked up the "Multi-Laser" and ran with it. Such as the SW authors. Does anybody think that they did this because the believed it to be cool, or just to allow Mr.Goto to not feel shamed for all time?


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## Moriouce (Oct 20, 2009)

The Tau get's new allies in the next supplement. Owoks (can't risk getting sued by Mr. Lucas), small furry bears that live in primitive villages and use rocks and logs to construct various traps that can immobilize even the strongest enemy armour. 

The Emperor of Mankind dies in the coming Codex:Space Marines, only to be reincarnated as a woman.


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## Chryckan (Jul 17, 2013)

Tawa said:


> Don't play with my hopes and dreams like that! :shok:



Wow, you must really be a fan of scratch and sniff....




Pixar just got the rights to the next Space Marine movie but to make it more family friendly the space marines are reconned into firefighters in space saving kind blue skinned aliens that has no relation to tau or commies.


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

Moriouce said:


> The Emperor of Mankind dies in the coming Codex:Space Marines, only to be reincarnated as a woman.


Just in time for a double-release with SoB's :wink:



Chryckan said:


> Wow, you must really be a fan of scratch and sniff....


You don't know the half of it :crazy:


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

Tawa said:


> You don't know the half of it


Indeed... Tawa is a fully scratchable and sniffable Furby... he smells like plastic crack and superglue...

And for a new rumour: GW will release a new line of pot-noodle flavors inspired by the 40k universe. Flavors will include Garden Grox, Teriaki Termagant, and Creamy Catachan Devil...


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## Zion (May 31, 2011)

To reduce costs on future codexes all books will now be printed in a simple line art style with a basic set of crayons provided. These new Citadel Crayons will also come in packs of various color schemes to allow you to color your book up like your favorite faction.


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

Deneris said:


> Indeed... Tawa is a fully scratchable and sniffable Furby... he smells like plastic crack and superglue...


Hang on, was that you sniffing me at the open day.....? :shok:


As for the pot noodles, GIMME!!!


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## Deneris (Jul 23, 2008)

Tawa said:


> Hang on, was that you sniffing me at the open day.....? :shok:
> 
> 
> As for the pot noodles, GIMME!!!


*Hides lock of Tawa fur that he snipped off*

Nope, wasn't me...:search:

Rumour: Using the advances in 3D printing, GW will now offer customizable heads that can be used on IG/Marines. Now YOU can be your own Force Commander or Commissar! GW will also offer a set of staff heads for those that want a Penal Legion filled with Matt Wards and C.S. Gotos...


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## Tawa (Jan 10, 2010)

GW is branching out into Romans, The Zulu Wars, The English Civil War & WW2.
These ranges will be modelled in such a way as to be fully compatible with 30/40k and Warhammer as appropriate.




Deneris said:


> *Hides lock of Tawa fur that he snipped off*
> 
> Nope, wasn't me...:search:


Wait a minute......


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## Moriouce (Oct 20, 2009)

GW will soon announce that they intend to open a second grade retailing store online where kits at half price will be sold. "We hope to attract a new generation of hobbyist to carry GW through the 21th century" said Mark Wells during a meeting with investors.


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